Three days after Hector’s #1 visit to Balti BLVD (36 High Street, Crawley RH10 1BW England), Dr. Stan sneaked back to savour the much elusive Lamb Qorma (£11.99). He pronounced it to be authentic, as Charming Daughter had claimed previously. Today would be Hector’s turn, and the lesser Chicken Qorma (£9.99) was foremost in mind. Enough Lamb this week already, and the Hector knows what awaits in the diary for next week.
*
The rendezvous was 12.30, Dr. Stan was in situ on my arrival, seated at a small table to my left. Down the right, a large multi-family group, weans and all.
Having had time to observe the in-house happenings, Dr. Stan declared that he was having the Breakfast. This was due to the breakfast at t’Travelodge being deemed inferior to an Ibis breakfast, such that Dr. Stan appears in Curry-Heute for the fourth time this week. Dr. Stan enjoys a good, four course breakfast.
On visit #1 to Balti BLVD, Hector did ask why only Coffee & Croissant (£4.99) were being served at opening time – Why no Desi Nashta?
Tuesday’s visit to nearby Tandoo’s established that they were doing a good trade in Desi Nashta. Did Curry-Heute first spot the opperchancity in the market?
Ready to order, Charming Daughter came over, there was an immediate air of recognition, after all, her image has been previously posted in these pages.
I’m here for your Desi Qorma!
No main courses until 14.00.
Hereafter she shall be referred to as – Daughter of Disappointment.
Only Breakfast was being served and what mains were ready. This turned out to be two Chicken Dishes, items which were not Curry, and Achari Lamb (£12.99). Another Lamb Curry it had to be, plus White Rice (£3.99).
And so to Dr. Stan and his – Special Breakfast.
Daughter mentioned Nihari, in fact so often was Nihari mentioned that I feared she had me down for Nihari. Who has Nihari for Breakfast? Dr. Stan!
Presumably, having seen an Omelette, Dr. Stan was keen to have this added to his Special Breakfast.
Then there was the Thali that even the Hector had seen being taken to the large table.
We’ll need a larger table – I proposed – that lot will stretch to the counter.
We were duly relocated further into the room.
Drinks were sorted: Sparkling Water (£1.50) for the Hector, who established earlier in the week that Crawley tap water is not potable for a Scottish palate. A soft drink (£2.50) for Dr. Stan.
We settled, in gentlemanly, companionable silence, for the wait. However, a little brat had a different idea.
Mummy, Mummy, Mummy!
For the second day in a row, this unnecessary triple, incessantly loud interruptions to adult conversation by a three year old, filling the room. Is this the sociological depth we have reached? Middle class mothers having to respond to every trivial question with an indulgent answer, before attempting to continue their own conversation. Is this what follows on from letting two-year-olds constantly bang the table with their spoon? Hector is perhaps long in the tooth, but recognises that certain Victorian standards should retain their place in a modern, peaceful society, or restaurant: children should be seen … or exterminated!
(Hector subscribes to – The Daily Dalek, one solution to all problems.)
In time, they departed. Daughter started the assembly of the fayre.
Nihari
Lamb Shank, always served on-the-bone, everyone should try this. With a Ginger Strip garnish, the full portion, sat in a traditional Shorva-esque Gravy, a meal in itself. I once witnessed three chaps sitting with a pile of Naan to share one plate of Nihari. Today, Dr. Stan would have to manage with just the two Naan, which were part of the Special Breakfast.
The Naan was magnificent. Served whole, as risen as any Naan ever seen, study that central blister. Light, fluffy Bread, there was no complaint when the Hector helped out a bit. The Naan had its own distinctive Seasoning. Between us, we managed to leave only one half. This is not the end of the Bread saga.
*
The Thali
A breakfast in its own right, behold two Puri accompanied by Aloo Sabzi, Chana Masala, and Halva. The Potato and Chickpeas were soon dealt with. Dr. Stan had not encountered Halva previously, I warned him it would likely be Sweet. He tackled the Halva carefully, then left it to the end, Dessert. Just the two Puri to accompany the Curry elements. Anda (sic) there’s more.
Was it the Omelette which had first caught Dr. Stan’s attention? Sat beyond the Naan, but not to be ignored. How many Eggs? A fine example of a freshly made, Spicy Omelette, a classic component of Desi Nashta.
Dr. Stan – I had intended to have a Breakfast. With two soft Puri, Aloo Sabzi consisting of well cooked Potato, Chana Masala with lightly spiced chickpeas, and Halva which was rather sweet.
I also had an Omelette with tomato and a bit of chilli making a good tasty breakfast, nothing much like a Curry.
However, I managed to order a Special Nihari as well. This was a lamb shank with meat falling off the bone, cooked in a highly spiced and tasty sauce. The sauce might have been rather thin but was very good when soaked up by the Naan. I only managed one of the two Naan, I’m afraid.
I should have made a movie: Dr. Stan Does Breakfast.
Hector was having fun too.
More Basmati than would fit on the medium-sized plate was provided, more Rice than a Hector could eat. A bit messy.
A Salad arrived too, part of my Curry order. Having spent a good hour this morning preparing Peanut Masala Chat for later today, the presentation of Tomato, Cucumber and Onion was quite ironic. I toyed with it.
Too spicy! – said a lady, at Maggie’s – not a BBQ. I should download more -Daily Dalek memes.
Achari Lamb
This was special, and Clive told me later that it is his go-to Curry at Balti BLVD. I can see why. Served on-the-bone, Sucky Bones too, thus the Masala was enhanced.
A possibly blended, quite Soupy Masala, or just cooked down, a beautiful Texture. The dark brown hue was class.
The first dip of purloined Naan produced the definitive – wow! – moment. The Seasoning, the Spice Level, spot on, glorious Flavours. Yet, in terms of Achari, there was but a light tanginess, I could neither see the customary Pickle elements, never mind taste them.
Eight pieces of Meat, a standard restaurant portion, with just the right amount of chewing. Importantly, the Lamb had been totally infused, and was therefore giving back the Flavours from the Masala, complementing its own meatiness.
As I ate on, another Flavour emerged, one I recognised. Here was the same background sense of – slightly burnt Onion – as featured in my last home-cooked Achari. Well, mine was certainly burnt.
A glorious Curry, one should not tire from having this every week.
Hector has still to taste the Desi Qorma at Balti BLVD.
The Bill
£45.45 Now the individual components of Dr. Stan’s Special Breakfast are revealed: Nihari Special (£12.99), Halva Puri (£7.99), Omelette (£2.99).
He only wanted a Boiled Egg.
The Aftermath
There was a lengthy chat with Daughter of Shaheen. Firstly, that I was not aware of Pickle in my Achari, yet was still thoroughly impressed. That Balti BLVD do not use the standard tub of Pickle was already evident. Whatever Mother-the-Chef, who we met last year, employs to create her remarkable Masala, shall remain her secret.
The infused Meat commanded a special mention. That so many venues cannot present a Curry at this standard raises the question: how are they getting away with it? The profusion of so-called Chicken Curry might be at the root of the answer. I admitted that today I would have ordered Chicken, but did explain why.
Wholemeal Flour, as used in the Roti at Balti BLVD, was condemned. Today’s white flour was highly praised, hence the outstanding quality of the Naan. And just how much Bread is one expected to eat with a Curry?
Do I have to wait a year for another visit to Crawley?
2026 Menu
Friday, a day out in – that London. 
A return to aforementioned venues could have caused people to be caught 
Our Bread order could not be accepted because the dedicated Chef was not on duty. The restaurant was busy, who was producing the Bread? Was this not an admission that all Bread being currently served would not be up to scratch? 
Normally, the Hector would eat straight from the karahi, determined to see what was actually in it, the decision was made to decant.
A coloured, watery residue drifted to one end of the plate. This looked less like Oil, more Spinach water. Assuming, this had Flavour, it was duly mopped up, watery indeed. This interpretation for this Saag/Palak was midway between the two classic Curry styles. With the Herb Mash prominent, there was still more than a hint of Masala, as proven by the presence of Tomato Seeds. A decent kick, the Seasoning was at a low level which can be typical of a Saag/Palak. The well-Seasoned Naan came to the rescue here. Otherwise, the hoped for Earthy Flavour was at a minimum.
Nine pieces of Meat, most of them large, a decent portion, not forgetting the mass of Spinach. The Lamb had a fibrous Texture, one day I shall identify this cut. Some Meat was decidedly chewy whilst others were super-soft, on the edge of turning to pulp. A working pot then, being replenished as necessary.
That was poor – I said to Dr. Stan – too watery, the Meat was incidental.
How many Seekh Kebab had been used to create this shall remain an unknown pro tem. The sheer volume presented must surely impress. Seekh Kebab smothered in Keema. Reviewing from the perspective as a Keema Karahi, this ticks the boxes: the Dryness, the absence of peripheral Oil, Minimal, if any, recognisable Masala. Add to this, the visible well-fired extremities and the presumed Herb content of a Lamb Seekh Kebab, then this creation has it all.
A very good level of spice – was an early remark by Clive. He later added:
Yet another waiter cleared the table, he raised a smile, the only sense of a welcoming acknowledgment throughout our visit. Even the chap who took payment was sullen.
After The Eclipse 
Having watched today’s near total eclipse via a pinhole in a 
There is no truth in the rumour that the three amigos had partaken in ye olde English banquet earlier.
Spice Spree was first encountered 365 days ago, the first time our collective visited Canterbury. The somewhat rundown exterior gives way to a large dining area which may or may not be palatial. An Indian and Pakistani restaurant, the menu posted in the window enticed. The Hector had resolved that if there was a return to this historic city, Spice Spree would be investigated.
After the eclipse, it was 20.15 when we entered the empty restaurant.
After yesterday’s Lamb extravaganza at 
Aloo Gobi (£6.50) and Saag Paneer (£6.50) – Indian Style – would be accompanied by a Keema Naan (£3.95). Potato and Spinach, but separately. Maggie chose Saag Aloo (£6.50), Potato with Spinach. Having heard all the best parts of the menu, Clive went for his fallback: Chicken Dhansak (£12.95), plus a Keema Naan. 
Liquid seemed incidental. Once again, the Hector would expose himself to some English tap water, not that they have too much of it currently. Can nobody extend the aqueduct from Kielder Dam beyond the Tees?
The wait was longer than expected, better than fast food.
Timed to arrive with everything else, the Samosas truly were as described. Maggie took a nibble, regular readers know what comes next – Too Spicy!
Samosas were now up for grabs, however, the rest of us had enough food. Clive wrapped three in a napkin, for later. Maggie:
Served whole, risen, puffy, with big blisters and ample Coriander, this ticked many of the boxes for a quality Naan. It was then a matter of appraising the filling: discrete grains of Mince, or a Donner-like slab of Meat?
An empty Naan? In a manner of which Euripedes would have been proud, I pulled the Naan apart. At the far end, a blob of Mince, definitely in the Donner-like category, and tasted as such. What’s more, the other two Naan on the table were the same. Clive had given Maggie half a Naan, he had the Meaty end, Maggie the plain. A veritable tragedy.
Indian Style – is a Spicier version compared to – Mild Creamy – the next item on the menu.
The same Mash of Spinach, a much more wholesome creation, Potato does absorb the Flavours of whatever it is sat in. Less protein than Paneer, but surely more enjoyable? Maggie:
Hector’s turn to have Potatoes. The Oil collecting on the periphery, and the slice of Tomato were noted. The Potatoes had been well cooked, as is required, the Cauliflower was way too soft. Cauliflower needs a bit of firmness else it becomes too close to mush, and the Masala Mash in which it sits. Other than its innate Flavour, the Cauliflower was giving nothing else back.
In the excitement of analysing the Keema Naan, Hector was missed out in the round of ritual photos. Never fear, A-One (sic) to the rescue.
No series of Curry outings with Clive would be complete without a Dhansak. A Curry I cannot recall ever having eaten, perhaps in this period in the avoidance of overdosing on Lamb, it might make another appearance soon. 
Unremarkable, pleasant as a Dhansak should be.
Possibly the only – true Curry – on the table, one may deduce that the Cauliflower here was also cooked beyond its ideal level. An Aloo Gosht might have been a better option, but then one would be on the receiving end of a Mainstream Curry, not the Desi – Aloo Gosht complete with Shorva which pops up occasionally in
The Bill
Whilst Marg’s – Masters World Cup – continues on the outskirts of 
Modern and bright, complete with a bar that does not appear to have much in the way of alcohol, though the Hector was not studying the cocktails that closely, Tandoo’s seats around thirty. On our arrival, two other diners were in situ, we soon had the place to ourselves.
Lamb on-the-bone was spotted, but maybe the Hector was somewhat relieved to find this only under the Biryani banner. Biryani rarely appears in these pages, that it did so three days ago at 
Last time here, Maggie had the half kilo of Lamb Charsi Karahi (£24.50) and was intent on repeating this. This is an outrageous premium for the half kilo, and so the Hector, in a moment of simple logic, had this changed to the full kilo at £38.50.
Maggie added Mushroom Rice (£4.95), not so competitively priced, to the Order. Rice with Karahi? The Hector will have to work on this. At least Maggie has overcome the impatient need to order a Starter, then to only nibble at her main course. A kilo between two? A challenge for us both, typically I only partake in this volume with three mouths.
A litre bottle of Still Water (£3.50) was already on the table, I would capture some photos elsewhere, quite an array. Nobody reached for the Still. A glass, with ice, saved the day.
Quazi said something along the lines of, the next one will follow as he placed a substantial karahi between Maggie and Hector. Ever the gentleman, the Hector let Maggie have Karahi #1, except she didn’t touch it. The Mushroom Rice was being enjoyed alone. Everyone was eating except Hector. Quazi was consulted, Karahi #2 would follow once we had dealt with Karahi #1. Maintaining hot food, a great idea, but not the visual impact of the full kilo.
Fear not, the actual karahi was comparatively small, the contents large; both Meat and Bones. The Masala did not resemble any Charsi Karahi previously reviewed in these pages, nothing Thin and Tomatoey here. The first dip revealed all:
The Masala was much Thicker, and the Flavour was decidedly Punjabi, not Afghani. Quazi would later confirm that Chef’s origin as Pakistan.
The Lamb was a joy. Tender, tasty, and giving of Spice in addition to its own Meatiness. Sucky Bones, yay!
With a red tint and a more Soupy edge, plus visible, thick Tomato pulp, hard to believe this was cooked by the same hand. Closer to the anticipated Charsi, but still way better.
The Flavour seemed to be less intense, but maybe the palate had adjusted, but Maggie and I both knew that Karahi #1 was the standout.
The distinctly dark smear of Masala was a departure from the norm. Large pieces of Potato stood out, the Cauliflower beneath. That the Good Doctor knew he had the appetite to deal with this and his main course was a function of the lack of food afore. Had the Hector not been fully comitted to the Karahi, no doubt a Soupçon could have been secured. 
Topped with a threat of Coriander, the Masala here was even thicker than Karahi #1. With Meat protruding, this had the appearance of a very fine Curry, no Soup here.
Dr. Stan – The Lamb Naga was rich and highly spiced, with a good blend of flavours and tender meat. The Aloo Gobi was spicy as well, though so not so much as the Naga, but the flavours came through providing an excellent complement to it. A fresh, crispy, Paratha finished off a really good meal.
Here, a topping of Coriander and Syboes with the Peas spread across the classic Keema. This was a proper Keema, minimal Masala, thick, and no surplus Oil 
collecting on the periphery. Added to this, whatever Chef was using to produce the Garlic Chilli element. Later, I would see – The Big Pot.
The Bill
We shall definitely be back. 
Complex cooking was not part of the plan for today, however, a bowlful of Tomatoes had other ideas.
For the protein, Lamb, of a sort. Spotted recently in my local butcher, what Mother used to purchase for Curry, a cut called – skirting. The apprentice butcher who sold it, had not heard of this term. 
Three Potatoes were cut into wedges. Adding raw Potato to a Masala, brave Hector. Instinct told me to add some water. 
Spinach, Methi and Coriander, the Herb content was prominent, yet I could take comfort from the knowledge that Onions and Tomatoes were in there too. This Masala had a consistency I could be proud of.
Duly plated, surplus Oil from frying the Mushrooms and Rice, was the only down side. Everything else was a plus. The appearance of the Masala was as good, nay better, than than I have seen for sometime in 
Biryani was foremost in Hector’s mind on
Chef Suriya greeted from the kitchen as I entered the otherwise empty premises at 15.00.
Biryani, I’ve not had it – pointing to the graphic on the wall. Biryani is not in 
I know my capacity for Rice, from the outset it was apparent that this was a step beyond. Two could comfortably have shared this as a complement to respective Curry choices.
The Sauce arrived moments later.
A small lake was created in the middle of the plate to accommodate the Sauce. Thin, Shorva-esque, this would add the required moisture and a tangy bitterness to the main event. The Seasoning was just enough, the Level of Spice would build.
As they must, the Texture of the Vegetables varied. The Cauliflower and Carrots had retained a slight firmness, we don’t want mush. The Potato had been further cooked and on cutting, exposed some infiltration of Spice. The Onion added a gum-like Texture.
The hoped for – wow – was not achieved. Maybe I just have to accept that the Mushroom Rice at 
It’s August Bank Holiday, the Scottish one. Our schools go back in a couple of weeks, there’s no no point having another holiday at the end of the month. A Bank Holiday, Civil Servants aside, nobody else seems to really know about it, unless one works in a bank.
Arriving at 
A mature chap we had never seen before, brought the customary Salad, Raita, and jug of water. The tap water this far south only had a slight taste of bleach. Seemingly the further one goes from Tradeston, the less of an issue this is.
Two substantial pieces of Chicken on-the-bone, and lots of Chickpeas, sat in a Desi Shorva. The presence of sliced Green Chillies and Bullet Chillies cut lengthways, did not put Marg off. The solids were polished off. Marg:
When we arrived I knew I was hungry and I thought I would have Rice for a change. I chose the Chickpea and Chicken dish on the top shelf and added rice. The Salad arrived first, and we both nibbled on the onion, tomatoes, lettuce, and cucumber. I did not require any sauce. When the Rice arrived, it was huge and I knew we would not finish it. Both dishes arrived as well, Hector was having Quail, and I was looking forward to the Chickpeas and Chicken.
The overall taste was excellent, and full of different spices and flavours. There was an abundance of peppercorns in the oily sauce, as well as Green Chillies, and plenty of Chickpeas. The Chicken fell off the bone and added more texture and flavour. I had two large thighs, which was more than enough for me, when I placed a good topping of rice into my bowl. There was coriander leaves and coriander seeds throughout the Rice.
Hector was in the mood for a proper Desi Curry having had some unusual outings since the return from 
A brace, the torso and the legs were separate on the plate. The quantity of Shorva was clearly more that would have come out of a single container on display at the counter. So much Shorva in which to dip, fun. Ginger Strips and sliced Bullet Chillies were present here too. The first big blast of Flavour was Clove. Such joy, tasty, a good level of Spice and well Seasoned.
On seeing how much Rice was going to be left over, I decided to break a habit and add some to my Curry. As is shown, the last piece of Quail was eaten with Rice, thereafter, there was still plenty of Shorva in which to soak the Rice and keep it interesting. This turned out to be a bigger feast that envisaged at the start.
The three chaps with the Karahi were the only customers remaining as we made our exit. It was good to see so many at 
Today, Chicken Tikka Masala (£17.00) at Shish Mahal (60-68 Park Rd, Glasgow G4 9JF). Check the date: August 1st, not April 1st. Next, the Hector will be buying tickets for a musical, or even the ongoing Netball at the Commonwealth Games.
Lunch menu or a la carte? – asked the young waitress.
The waiter took the Order. 
A glass of Tap Water was provided. No bleach-taste north of the river. Nobody wants to tell me what’s going on in the Southside.
The Naan ticked every box in 
The handi-like bowl was brimming. Normally, with no Rice, I would eat directly from a karahi. And so that was how I had my first dip into the Masala.
Not the Tomato-pink I was expecting, but certainly – Creamy, 
Then I spotted it, the 
I began the process of isolating the 
The chap who I have described as – head waiter – could well have been a whole lot more. Having got the 
Meet Curryspondent Stuart, who expressed his appreciation of these humble pages. Humble? This does a lot for Hector’s ego. The rest of The Company were also gobsmacked, the first time they have witnessed this en masse.
The Village “Curry House”
Marg and Hector arrived at 
A jug of tap water completed the Order. Today, no taste of bleach. New glasses.
The Peri-Peri Chips covered a third of the plate. Suitably dusted with Paprika (?), one assumes frozen Chips, another reason why Hector avoids them. Can people not peel Potatoes any more?
Marg: We did not wait long. My Quarter Chicken was the leg, and I was able to pick up the joint and eat all the chicken off the bone. The lemon was sharp but the herb did not stand out.
I had to wait for the Salad and so was staring at the mass of Rice for quite some time.
The standard Pilau at 
When the Salad arrived, a proper plateful. The Mayo would work well with the elements of the Salad, but Rice and Mayo? Not for the Hector.
Blindfolded, I would have picked this out as 
As is always the case with Chicken, the skin had been impregnated, what lay below was just – white Meat. The limitations of this agenda were now exposed.
The Bill
Tharas Takeaway (55 Woodlands Rd., Glasgow G3 6ED) opened in 2025, it was Curryspondent Stewart who informed Hector that there are two tables. As with the comparable 
Fish Curry was confirmed, but what to have with it? Anticipating a Curry way more Soupy than Desi-Punjabi fayre, I enquired about the Masala. The serving chap seemed to suggest that there was a degree of flexibility, however, the Hector was keen to establish the Tharas norm. Boiled Rice (£3.00) was deemed to be the better option.
I was given a glass and returned to my seat. Water was on the table already, so unlike 
A full twenty minutes plus had passed before I was summoned to the counter. No table service.
Two bits of Fish were decanted from the dark, somewhat viscous, Masala. The interior of the Fish would be revealed as white. Rohu/Carp was my best guess. The bone content would prove to be significant, this would not be easy eating.
Both Onion strips and larger blobs of Onion had a major presence in the Masala. Whole Green Chillies, Onion Seeds and Curry Leaves were in there too. Quite a busy Masala.
With still no sign of the Chef-server, how to announce 