In anticipation of Marg, Hector and Steve arriving in Crawley this very evening, Clive had been raving about a new Curry House discovered some 10km east of Crawley. Tarana (Selsfield Road, Turners Hill, Crawley, West Sussex, RH10 4PP) is not the sort of venue you would stumble across. This Restaurant is another Pub Conversion, not the first Pub to become an Indian Restaurant in this area. Maggie’s favourite home from home – Horley – has been visited a couple of times.
Clive and Maggie have been to Tarana a couple of times in recent weeks, the Service they claim was outstanding and of course the Curry impressed. The Best Curry House in Britain is an Award they claim to have won. Who wins Awards? Clive also assured me they would endeavour to make any Dish on request, were they up for The Hector Challenge?
We were halfway to Partridge Green when Maggie was persuaded that Curry was more important than Bier. We might manage a Bier or Ten over the weekend. Entering just after 21.00, the car park was stowed, very few places, what chance a table? We were shown to a curved seating area on the far side of the Bar and invited to wait whilst a table was sorted, Drinks were a matter of course. Cobra is not the best, the alternative does not even rate a mention.
I had time to study the Menu at the Bar, Lamb Korai featured Green Peppers, but Clive had guaranteed Customised Dishes. As we were shown to our table, Hector disappeared for a moment. On my return a Pile of Poppadoms and an impressive Array of Dips and Bits were provided. The Coconut Powder was a hit. This was an estimated £7.00 worth.
Chicken Dansak, I suggested to Lord Clive. He fell for it. I still don’t get his fascination for this Dish. Clive also asked for a Side of Aloo Palak. Lady Maggie who was hoping a Curry would clear her head asked for the Rashuni Chicken Chilli, but with a more modest Chilli content. Marg went for Achari Chicken, Steve the Lamb Madras – for the more discerning palate – The Menu claimed. The Waiter noted everything on the Pad, Rices and Breads too: Two Stuffed Paratha, a Chapatti, Two Pilao Rice. Now for The Hector.
Lamb Korai with No Capsicum. There are Green Peppers cooked in the Sauce – I was informed. Are you allergic? No, I just don’t want Strips of Green Pepper topping the Dish. This was accepted. The rest: Dry, Minimal Masala, Swell-seasoned and Fresh Methi if you have it. A Side of Aloo Gobi too, please. It was impossible to tell how much of this was recorded, the Pad had on-screen buttons, a Curry App?
The Waiters hovered waiting for another Drinks order. Despite the Venue being very full when we arrived the Service was impeccable. A Large Group of Ladies at an adjacent table, cue the hysteria. From my vantage point, I could see various Dishes being wheeled out, no sign of Soup, encouraging.
The wait was well within acceptable parameters, but it did mean continuing our journey to Partridge Green was now off The Menu.
The Breads were not Large, probably a Sensible Size. Marg’s Chapatti arrived folded in Foil, a very Modest Chapatti, one was enough? With everything delivered the ritual photos were completed. Note Hector’s new T-shirt complete with – The Banned Phrase.
Two of the Dishes looked Impressive, the Korai in particular, laters. Two were Soup.
Marg was first to make a comment on her Achari, she was loving it, and Butter Chicken was on The Menu. A Great Curry, hit the spot. Creamy, Tasty. The Chapatti was like a little present, to unwrap.
Maggie was not blown away and also cleared her plate. Taylor made with less Chilli. Even with a stinking cold I could still taste … the flavours.
Clive’s Dansak was- Absolutely fine, it made the tongue tingle without being ridiculously hot. Dry, relatively.
Steve has still not recovered from Bradford, he clearly expects every Curry to be of that standard now. An average Curry, bog standard.
The Lamb Korai had a Modicum of Flavour, it was under-seasoned. There was no great Kick but was Spicy enough to be considered – Curry. The Lamb was in Large Pieces, Tender (I was offered the choice), however a couple of Tiny Bits of Gristle had sneaked in. There was enough Masala in which to Dip the quite impressive Paratha, however the Curse of the Tampered-with Karahi was there. Having withheld the Capsicum, Chef had overloaded the Onion. This was how Marg frequently receives Curry, to her horror. The Onions were cut Large, there was an Extreme Excess of Onion which gave a Slimy Texture to the Dish overall, it spoiled the entire experience. The Excess had to be left.
The Two Sides performed well. A different Texture from the Meat Dishes and served as Dry as one hoped.
Not a bad experience overall, but I did ask Clive to take me to The Downsman next time I’m Down in Crawley.
The Bill
£110.98. Two Rounds of Drinks, Two Sides, Five Diners.
The Aftermath
The Waiter placed a side plate with six small white – mint looking – objects beside a jug. Who ordered Coffee and Mints? He poured the contents, hot water, over the – mints – which burst into life. Self raising mints. These were the hand-towels. Novel. Perhaps the lasting memory of the visit, and as Hector was taken by surprise, no Photos!
The Calling Card was left with the cash, no further comments.
Oh, the staff were hosing down the outside stairs as we departed…somebody had disgraced themselves. Still no more Photos!…
… and so to München where there is a Very Special Curry House …