I wonder if they have fixed the hand drier! – texted Alan earlier in the day. November 2022 was the last time Alan, Tracy, Marg and Hector dined at Akbar’s (573-581 Sauchiehall Street G3 7PQ). Other Curry Houses are available, and it does take an alignment of the planets for the four of us to be free on the same evening.
The booking was for 19.00, Marg was last to arrive, once again Maria was our efficient waitress.
Poppadoms were suggested: if Imran wants us to have them, they will arrive.
There was no sign of Imran this evening.
Only one small bottle of Sparkling Water (£3.00) was ordered this evening, by Marg. The Hector succumbed to a solitary pint of Cobra (£6.95), an outrageous charge for a bog standard lager. Tracy had a small bottle (£5.00) of the same, even less value. Alan considered a bottle white wine (£24.95) to be his optimum tipple. Served warm, just how long was one supposed to wait for the ice bucket to have any effect? The pint of lager was also served at too warm a temperature. A top up with ice was required.
Akbar’s are making a mint from Drinks sales, they could at least serve them at the appropriate temperature.
Hector was here for the food, Bradford Curry in Glasgow. A repeat of my choices on the last visit in January should be manageable: a share of Meat Chops (£7.95) followed by Karahi Gosht & Spinach (£15.95). Marg, who has not had Keema for ages, opted for Karahi Keema & Matter (£14.50).
A bit of persuasion was now required. Marg prefers a Chapatti (£1.00) as her optimum accompaniment, Nobody else desired Naan, and for one, a waste of Bread. Marg agreed to share a Coriander & Chilli Nan (£4.50).
As on their last visit, Alan and Tracy were sharing Meat Chops then having Karahi Gosht & Spinach and Karahi Chicken & Spinach (£14.95) respectively. Why has it taken Hector so long to catch on to this Saag/Palak delight? Tracy asked for Chicken Tikka. Once more, a Chapatti each.
Maria took the Order. She admitted to remembering Marg & I from January this year.
How was the tip?
This she couldn’t remember. She should now remember having her photo taken.
Maria made it clear that anything we weren’t happy with could be replaced. The Order would have to be wrong before Hector would do this, or inedible, an unlikely outcome. Alan did ask for more ice, that the Bier and Wine was warm was communicated.
We always ask for the Meat Chops to be well done. After many years, we are still waiting for them to be truly cremated. Maybe tonight was the night? Neither Alan or I had, as yet, checked the hand drier.
Served – Desi-style – was also the requirement for Alan, Tracy and Hector.
When ordering from the Desi-Apna section of the menu, why do we have to ask? Even in Bradford, this has become the norm.
We settled down for the wait. Once upon a time the staff at Akbar’s used to give a precise time, no more.
Tonight, the sun was still high enough in the sky to cause problems for those of us sitting at the window and facing west. Despite the presence of blinds, these were purely decorative. Alan was but a silhouette from my side of the table. It’s an ill wind…
Maria brought two Dips, then the bottle of Chilli Sauce, which staff here were previously programmed to describe as – Special. Has it lost its edge?
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Meat Chops
Four Lamb Chops, and after my most recent visit to The Downsman (Crawley), these remain attractively priced in comparison.
There was only a hint of Charcoal on some of the eight Chops presented. Is the kitchen simply not willing to serve them as asked for? One of my two had two pink spots, so not even cooked through never mind – well done.
Still, their succulence impressed the Hector, tasty, and with the other bits on the plate, as much an amuse-bouche as a Starter per se. Four Chops are always better than two, but knowing what follows, one has to be realistic. The Chilli Sauce did take the Spice Level up to – eleven.
Tracy, who generally does not eat Lamb, was not impressed by her Chops.
Awful, too fatty.
This was relayed to Maria. The complaints were piling up, no action.
Proper Chapattis, not the Wholemeal versions which I keep encountering. But missing out on the ritual of the Naan at Akbar’s, no way.
Partly risen, puffy loadsa blisters, Hector’s sort of Naan.
I moved the Naan from the edge of the table towards the centre. I was then able to obscure the sun. It also meant I couldn’t see Alan at all for the duration of the eating.
Karahi Gosht & Spinach
The pathetic piece of Lemon was insulting, neither use or ornament. If adding Lemon Juice is a key part of this Dish, then give a decent slice, not the skin. The Coriander as a Topping was incidental given the Herb content of the Curry.
A Masala with Herbs, the Oil collecting on the periphery, Hector’s ideal Methi/Palak Gosht. The plentiful Meat was cut small but not as extreme as – Bradford small. The overall volume did not appear to be challenging, the eyes can mislead. In time I would have to abandon the Bread, as is my norm, to concentrate on the Karahi.
The Dry, Thick, Bradford Curry had set the standard of expectation long before the birth of Curry-Heute. The Bradford Curry Taste was there, sensed immediately. Even in Bradford I have failed to register this of late, if at all. Methi, it must have been in there too. Contradicting the empirical writings in Curry-Heute, this intensity of Flavour had been achieved with a remarkably low level of Seasoning. The Herbs fill the gap.
The Spice Level was moderate. The sliced Green and Red Chillies added extra bite when the notion took me.
Desi-Apna, yet no Whole Spices present, no Bones, and whilst the Tender Meat was key to the overall enjoyment it was not giving much else back. Dare I ask, how was this a Desi Curry?
There was something fundamental which made my enjoyment of this Curry less than it could have been. I watched the vapour rise from Marg’s Keema, most certainly this was not emanating from my Karahi. How long had my Curry been sitting before it was brought to the table? The curse of dining in a restaurant, and as ever, tonight, Akbar’s was wedged. Warm food, Hector likes his – hot.
Loads of promises – remarked Alan who sought even more ice to try and cool the wine. – the chops were tasty but very under fired, despite the well fired order. Some were better than others.
The main was good.
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Karahi Chicken Tikka & Spinach
Who doesn’t like Chicken Tikka? If one is going to have a Chicken Curry, then maybe this is the better option? However, pouring Sauce over Meat does not a Curry make.
Given the unique request, one can deduce that Chicken and Masala had only recently been introduced. Again, how was is this a Desi Curry? Tracy’s verdict for the evening:
Unfortunately for me the starter was fatty and well under fired despite asking to be well fired. My (Curry) was supposedly Chicken Tikka, tasted like boiled chicken to me.
Tracy tends to take a Doggy Bag home with around half of her main course. Tonight she went for it, managing a quantity such that only tiddlers remained.
Does one assume enjoyment?
Karahi Keema & Matter
Topped with Coriander and a decent slice of Lemon, this was a classic Keema. Below the Mince, just a hint of Masala collecting on the base of the karahi. The Peas, and Potato when offered, always add a new dimension to – just Spicy Mince.
Marg had plenty to say this evening:
Decided to share the Lamb Chops starter. Four chops arrived, and although we asked for them well fired, only one seemed slightly burnt. I enjoyed the flavour of them.
When my Keema Matter arrived it was a big portion. The mince and peas were full of spice and there was an enjoyable kick of coriander as well. We shared a Coriander & Chilli Nan which was hung on the metal tree stand. Unfortunately for me, I would have preferred a Roti. The Chilli Nan made my dish too spicy for me. I enjoyed the rich flavours from the Keema. Did not eat too much of the Nan.
There was a Doggy Bag.
I ordered Kashmiri Tea (£4.95) after the food. A pink/brown liquid arrived in a tea cup with a few spices floating. An enjoyable drink and good for digestion.
Alan and Tracy had their customary Espresso (£2.95), whilst the Hector still had the dregs of his solitary lager, to which further ice had been added to prolong the pleasure.
By the end of the meal enough displeasure had been tallied: warm wine, insufficiently chilled Bier, fatty Chops, not cooked as asked, the blinding sun not able to be dealt with, warm-not-hot main course.
The front of house staff were not to blame for any of the above, so giving them a hard time would have been grossly unfair. The question has to be asked: what are the people behind them up to?
The saga of the hand drier may be an indication of this. I found it to be operating, but the direction nozzle missing. Alan regarded this as still broken.
He summed up our visit:
Disappointing, lots of talk, no walk. Nothing lasts forever, although the broken hand drier might!
The Bill
£140.00 Including £1.00 extra for the Chicken Tikka.
The Aftermath
The conversation after the meal was basically about where to go in Glasgow next time. We may have to accept that the venues with the best Curry do not have the ambience, and don’t serve booze.
The number of 
It was therefore with great anticipation when Marg and Hector headed west on S-Bahn 28 from 
Arriving at Rice & Spice at 12.40, a young chap greeted in what we soon realised was quite an extensive venue. He led us towards the dining area in the garden at the rear. 
Drau
Drinks were sorted before we waded through the extensive menu. A bottle of Fanta (€3.00) and a 0.75l bottle of Sparkling Water (€6.00) were secured. 
The extensive menu was recorded, having seen part of it online already, I knew that the Lamm Karahi is why I was here. The description of the ingredients: Ginger, Garlic, Tomato – is true to a Desi Masala. Not the Onion & 
Paye and Haleem were tucked away at the end. No price quoted, I wonder what the demand is for these Punjabi delicacies in Kaarst? Of greater attraction to Hector, Kofta (various), Shami and Seekk Kebab were also available, served with the same accompaniments as our choices. The good people of Kaarst may have won a watch. 
An Interesting Salad was brought to the table. Beneath the dressing lay Grapes, Sweetcorn, Tomato, Apple, Kidney Beans, shredded Carrot & Cabbage, plus some green stuff. Rather than tear in, we both maintained the integrity of the Salad, what else might come?
It was during the efficacious thirty minute wait for the food to be prepared, that Mein Host arrived. Ahmed appreciated that we had not just happened to be in Kaarst. I decided not to reveal –
Three sets of tea-lights were lit. 
In time, Ahmed brought all the food to the table. 
Two Roti, quartered, were presented. Wholemeal, not my preferred Flour, though this suited Marg. The Bread would turn crispy, I was now glad we had Rice. Between us, we would take care of six of the eight quarters.
The large Lamb Chop came as a surprise. On-the-bone, the Meat had not been discussed, this was a veritable bonus. Decanting the Boneless pieces to the plate confirmed there was plenty of eating here. 
The Spice hit the palate first, I had to wait a few moments for the Flavours to reveal themselves. There was nothing pronounced e.g. Clove, Cumin. This Masala was well balanced, truly enjoyable. One thing was immediately apparent, this was not 
The final pieces of Meat were taken from the karahi and smothered with the retained Masala. My last mouthfuls were Curry & Rice, most unusual having ordered – Karahi. I just about managed to clear my plate.
With the Masala at an absolute minimum, this Curry was far from anything served in the Mainstream 
Marg kept offering me a Soupçon. I declined these offers oft, concentrating on maintaining the Flavours on my own palate. In time I relented, a piece of Cauliflower crossed the table. 
A large portion of Salad arrived at the table and we wiated until the main course arrived before devouring it. 
The young chap cleared the table then brought the promised – Beilagen. Two micro-Desserts. One was Sweet Rice with an Almond, the other Rice Noodles in what Marg interpreted as condensed milk. .
Whenever I eat Desi Karahi Gosht, it is generally in less salubrious surroundings. A meal for the eating, a quick in and out. Today was an event, we had – dined. 
Time for 
It was bang on 15.00 when I arrived at 
After what felt like an appropriate wait, Rajiv brought out the food, the aroma already had me won. The presentation was commensurate with dining at any Curry Restaurant, that I was sitting in such a small area did not matter at all.
This accompaniment deserves its own banner, a first in 
Three Ginger Strips topped the Chettinad served in a handi. The seven pieces of Meat were arranged over the Rice, six of these would be halved, so absolutely no issue with the portion size. The viscous Masala was pleasingly not – Shorva – as is too often the case when ordering Chettinad. As ever, some Masala was kept back for the end game.
The aroma had already confirmed the efficacy of this South Indian Curry. The Coconut smokiness complemented the contrasting blend of Spices from the Rice. This was the perfect marriage of Curry and Rice. The Spice Level and Seasoning seemed incidental. With this intensity of Flavour on the palate, each mouthful was a joy.
Those of us who have enjoyed these magic moments when everything comes together, the synergy, should appreciate what is being described here: that which makes – Curry – a unique food. It’s way more than meat in a Spicy Sauce. 
Unlike 
Indieflavours (Odranska 18/19 50-113 Wroclaw, Polska) is found to the north-west of the Old Town, metres from an imposing university building which will have to be investigated at another date. 
A few steps down from street level, Indieflavours has a contemporary décor. The brick walls are a long way from the flock wallpaper we grew up with. Indieflavours seats around twenty.
The menu proved to be difficult to capture on camera, the varied results are as ever, posted at the foot of this post. With only three Lamb Dishes to choose from and one of them Korma (Zl47), Hector options were then two. Whilst Fish appears in the Starters section, there was no Fish Curry. 
To accompany, a Butter Naan (Zl11) for Hector, a Garlic & Coriander Naan (Zl13) for James. I was pleased to see a 0.75 bottle of Sparkling Water (Zl15) on offer, rehydration is always a feature of these trips. James ordered a Lemonade (Zl9). 
James’ Starter duly arrived.
Given the price, I had warned James that this could be close to the volume of a main course. There was no surprise when a dozen-plus pieces of Chicken were presented incorporating the Big Onion Blobs and 
I was invited to sample a piece of Chicken, it was as expected. Shrouded in the universally available red Chilli Sauce, the Flavour outcome belonged to that populous land to the east of the Indian Subcontinent. Maybe out of place in a venue which calls itself Indieflavours? 
After the Breads and Mains were brought, so two bowls of Basmati appeared. I had previously studied the menu for any refreeze of inclusive Rice, the European way. If it was there, it was lost in non-translation. My Rice bowl remained untouched. James managed both Rice and Bread. Oh to be thirty again. Question: if I eat half as much, why am I twice as large? 
Behold an orange, Soupy Masala featuring a swirl of Cream, then topped with flaked Almonds. With Cashews mentioned in the description, not a Curry for anyone with a Nut allergy. The given description also mentioned – Fenugreek. 
James, who one day might graduate towards a more demanding Curry, ate the lot then offered these words:
Having seen photos online of the Lamb Shank encrusted with Spice, I had high hopes. My photo shows but a Lamb Shank smothered in the accompanying Masala. This was what it was, Nihari it wasn’t. 
The Masala was the standard Euro Masala encountered throughout the Continent. Creamy, viscous, a step up from the above Dish perhaps. 
The Bill
As before, the menu was an A3 laminated sheet. 
We left. 
T
Arriving at 15.30, Aniq, as ever, was manning the counter. Curry was on display, I still wonder how they transform this into what is served. It was only on the last 
I took a table at the rear of the premises. A sewing lady was beavering away at the window. 
The heart sank. What was this? The karahi was full of Shorva, where was the Meat? Three pieces of Meat? OK, they were large and each piece was subsequently cut into three, but in terms of presentation, this bore no resemblance to the wonderful Curry that has made me make a beeline to Osloer Strasse every time I come to 
I sampled the Shorva, a decent Spice Level, and the Seasoning was fine. The expected blast of Citrus was not happening. I ate on. Tender Lamb, but not giving anything back other than its own Meatiness. This Curry was a pale imitation of what has come before.
The Bill
… 
It was Chef Suriya who served me. I was directed to the – Sit In – menu housed in a dookit on the wall at the entrance. The Lunch Deal (£10.95) did not entice, no Lamb Curry. I studied the Takeaway/Delivery menu, more options. Suriya brought his copy from the counter, mine only had print on one side. Also! 
Lamb Curry With Ginger, first on the list, and two prices quoted: £9.50 to sit in, £12.95 to Takeaway. Unusual, however, the sitting in portion is presumably smaller. I watched £9.50 being noted. The Takeaway menu had Mushroom Rice (£3.95), way more interesting than the straightforward Pilau Rice (£3.40 / £3.70). 
Curry Cafe? – no, there is no ready-cooked Curry on display as per the oft visited venues on the Southside. As with 
This handi felt slightly smaller than the Rice. This made the Toppings of Ginger Strips and Coriander stand out. I counted six pieces of Meat as I arranged the Curry over the Rice. Two were decidedly larger, so the – minimum eight – was attained. A viscous, blended Masala, appearance-wise, this is what I had I mind for today. After Wednesday’s share of a kilo of 
A good Spice Level, far from being challenging, well Seasoned, the Hector was onside. Anticipating a blast of Ginger, I was surprised when this Curry took me towards the south of 
Clearing the plate, a sign that the quantities served were well judged. I didn’t need more, but was already planing a return visit. Saag, Bhoona, Chettinad, and even Karahi – 
It was Rajiv, front of house and taking phone Orders, who took payment. I showed him 
Mera Lahore (26/27 Haddington Place, Edinburgh EH7 4AF), one of the ribbon of Curry Houses on the stretch down towards Leith, has been on Hector’s radar for some time. A Punjabi restaurant in Edinburgh, and one of only four known in this city which serves Karahi Gosht by the kilo, i.e. in the authentic manner. 
We arrived at Mera Lahore at 19.40. Two tables were occupied in a venue which I shall describe as a – Pukkah Cafe. Two chaps, then a mother with two weans, were in situ. The toddler felt it necessary to climb all over the furniture, the baby was a screamer. The screaming was relentless, the worst ever experienced, and the Hector has made many a comment on this subject. What are parents thinking when they take these entities out to dine in public? A simple – there-there – or however this translates into Urdu, clearly does not work. Get the wean out, deal with it.
We couldn’t hear ourselves speak – the chaps at the adjacent table were keen to tell me when I went to take my photos of the surroundings. 
Having – persuaded – Dr. John in advance that we should share the kilo of Lahori Butt Lamb Karahi (£34.95), and that a Starter would be out of the question, he searched for this on the menu, whilst I photographed all. Aqib showed us the page. 
£4.00 more for – Boneless, interesting. Having prepared the appetite for late eating, I knew we should manage the kilo, Boneless, no, but then that’s not the true authentic Dish. 
Supposedly double-fried, the Pakora was well done. A decent portion. Dr. Henry:
another would be required.
The Meat covered the full extent of the flat karahi, no doubting the portion size. An array of Bones were visible, different cuts of Lamb, I could see thick Chops and a Sucky Bone!
I let my fellow diner did in, he took but a few morsels initially and purloined some of his Henry’s Rice. There must have been enough. 
The Masala lacks Seasoning – was my first note. That would turn out to be my only negative. 
This is what Dr. Henry orders, this is what he likes. If the Pakora was found to be – a little Spicy – then the base level has been established. This Chicken Korma was as Henry, and many other diners, are accustomed to. Dr. Henry:
I enjoyed my curry this evening. My Chicken Korma was sweet and tasty and the boiled rice a tiny bit on the dry side. Overall a satisfying meal.
My issue here is: apart from the Chicken, just what was in the karahi? Presumably no more than spoonful of Sauce from The Big Pot, a mass of Cream and a dose of Coconut. Chef could take the day off. Just what is one paying for here? Especially with the uniform pricing. 
The Aftermath
On leaving home this afternoon, Hector’s mind had traditional Curry & Rice foremost in mind, nothing exotic, something simple. En route to Partick it was realised that being a Monday, the intended venue opened later, i.e. too late. 
Arriving at Banta Wala at 13.45 the dining area was empty other than the waiter and waitress. 
The menu was an A3 paper sheet set as a table mat, but removed after ordering. The waitress took the Order for a 330ml bottle of Sparkling Water (£2.60) as I perused the menu. Lamb Rogan Josh (£14.95) was in keeping with the original plan for today, however, a memory of outstanding Paratha led me towards a Curry which should command Bread. It was in 
The food was brought by the waiter at 13.59.
The Paratha, served whole, was clearly overdone. Had this been a Naan I would no doubt have been celebrating the burnt extremities. 
Served on a plate, not a handi, there was no sign of the – earthenware – in which this creation had been reportedly cooked. Topped with Ginger Strips, the Dark, Thick, Herb-strewn Masala impressed. This is how the Hector likes his – Curry. 
As I was not decanting, it took a while to confirm that the Meat count was into double figures. Later, Steve would tell me that the last time he was here, he sent back his plate featuring a mere three pieces of Meat. Today, there was certainly no issue with quantity.
As outlined back in January when Marg cooked 
The point of this day is for me to sit down and eat, no planning, no involvement, as Marg does otherwise, seven days a week. Marg even had to go shopping to find the key ingredients. The full recipe remains unknown, some ingredients were not Hector’s – go-to. I have never cooked Caramelised Red Onions, I could do without them, same for Chickpeas and Mint. With Peas, these formed the Interesting Vegetables in what would become the Spicy Rice. 
With the Fish baked in the oven and the pre-cooked Rice added to the Vegetables on the gas hob, simples. 
Marg announced that the Raita was meant to be poured over the Fish. Other than squeezing the Lemon, no way was I adding something cold to hot Fish. I used the tasty Raita as a complement as and when. 
