I said I’d be back, and with Mother. After our Lidl Shopping, Hector and Mother managed to dodge the heavy showers and reach Lahore Kebab House (196 Albert Dr, Glasgow, G41 2NH) just before 14.00. Mein Host was manning the premises, no doubt thinking the Lunchtime Rush, if they have one, was over.
Kofta Anda was foremost in my mind, or Kofta Karahi (£7.50) as is listed. Having enjoyed the Lamb Karahi (£7.50) last week, I knew Mother would appreciate this. Boiled Rice (£1.80) as ever would required for Mother, a Chapatti (£0.70) for Hector.
70p for a Chapatti.
I approached the counter containing the ready made – Karahi Dishes. With the Order noted, I asked for – Hot Plates – which appeared to puzzle Mein Host who reminded me they are a – Takeaway – primarily. We agreed on – Medium Spice. Hector had enough Green Chillies on Saturday.
Would you like Onions on your Salad? – I was asked.
Oh yes. The Mint on the Onions was quite a revelation last time.
Having settled in at the table for four, Mother remarked on how much she liked this venue. The lack of – Musak – pleased. We could sit in peace.
Believe it or not, I’m hungry – was exclaimed during the short wait.
Kofta Karahi – Kofta Anda
I never seem to get enough of this, today I had a plateful. Six decent Kofta and two Boiled Eggs, halved. The Masala was the same Oily, Blended Masala I had experienced in the Lamb Karahi. Hopefully the Kofta Balls had been sat in the Masala for a sufficient length of time to take in some Flavour.
Having seen to Mother, it was time to tuck in. The Spice Level without the Topping of Chillies was still fine, as was the Seasoning. There was nothing to worry about here. Breaking open the first Kofta revealed a lighter colour than anticipated – Chicken. Ah well, The Curryspondents will be amused. Whatever blend of Herbs and Spices had been added to the Kofta-mix, it worked, this was a – Tasty Dish. The Eggs added another dimension, the Texture being markedly different from Meat or Vegetable. We should be adding a Boiled Egg to Curry as a matter of course.
The Chapatti was a decent size and girth, quite Standard. This was used to scoop up the Masala, the Kofta were spooned. The more I ate, the more I realised that the – Signature Taste – of the Lahore Kebab House was coming through. Peppery – I thought.
I would certainly have this again, and the Keema also looked interesting.
Lamb Karahi
Once again, this was presented on a flat, oblong plate. All could be seen. Ironically the plate was – Hot – but the accompanying Rice Plate was not. The Rice was – Steaming Hot – and so I decanted pieces of Lamb to the Rice as is the norm. I was careful not to take one of the four pieces of Meat – on-the-bone. The Meat was again well into double figures, so Mother had more than she could ever eat. The Lamb on-the-bone came in my direction, featuring two – Sucky Bones – full of Marrow. Mmmmm.
This is delicious – remarked Mother as soon as she started. A plan to come here with her friend was mooted, not that she could ever find her way back. The – Tenderness – of the Lamb was marvelled at.
The lack of excess Masala was proven by the rate at which it was absorbed by the Rice. This was a Curry fit for The Mother of Hector.
Let’s not overlook the Modest Salad. The Mint again added something different.
The Bill
£17.00 No charge for the Chapatti – said Mein Host.
The Aftermath
Did you enjoy that?
Excellent – was the Hector response.
Mein Host revealed that he plans to retire sometime sooner rather than later. This place has been his for years, he is the Chef also. As is a common problem throughout the Catering Community, the next generation are not interested in being tied down for so many hours a day.
I hope the next time I return to Lahore Kebab House, I find it in good fettle.
Update January 2020
Lahore Kebab House has gone.
Time will tell if the rebranded premises – Al Aqsa’s – will serve Curry or just Peri Chicken.
Life has its rituals, the monthly trip to Staggs (Musselburgh) followed by the first visit of 2018 to 
The Naan impressed immediately. Again served – Whole – the Quantity of Chopped Green Chillies and Coriander Leaves embedded was significant. With a Well Fired periphery, Light and Fluffy, this is what Hector considers to be a Perfect Naan. I rarely eat an entire Chapatti when I visit the 
The Toppings were a standout this evening. Both Coriander Leaves and Stem were spotted. The Quantity impressed, Mags would eventually face defeat, but there was not enough for a Takeaway. The Masala was of the Standard – Blended, Oily, Desi-style – that prevails across Glasgow’s Southside. As with all Lamb Dishes at 
Beneath the Ginger Strips, Sliced Large Green Chillies, Coriander leaves and Stems lay a very Hot and Spicy Marvel. The Flavour is unique to 
The first dip of Bread into the Oily Periphery sets the scene, if this doesn’t have you hooked then you’re at the wrong movie. The Masala was as Minimal as it could be, the Tomato-rich Mash was scooped on to pieces of Naan, this had the – Wow! On tackling the Meat, it felt at first as if it was a Stranger to the Masala, by the end this had been refuted. Tender Lamb, a few pieces on-the-bone, Maximum Flavour achieved. The Spice, Seasoning, Temperature, Quantity, Herb content, all Perfect. Chef Rashid should come out to take a bow.
Prompted by the above nonsense, I consulted a well known and reliable Curry Blog and realised Albert Drive has not been visited in years. The much lauded Lahore Kebab House (196 Albert Dr, Glasgow, G41 2NH ) was well overdue a return visit. 
It was as if the Lahore Kebab House has become stuck in time, the Dishes looked the same, and the prices have not changed either. Who has not put up their prices since 2014?
Mein Host stood opposite me on the other side of the counter. Having read the script from my first visit, I asked which was the Lamb Karahi (£7.50). I was told it was the corner tray nearest me. I had spotted the Kofta Anda also, I’ve been trying to track this down for months. 
The flatness of the plate meant I could see all instantly. Fourteen pieces of Meat, three of which were on-the-bone, a decent ratio. The now customary Ginger Strips and Fresh Coriander Leaves were complemented by Coriander Stems and slices of Large Green Chillies. This was quite a plateful, Mein Host was correct, I would have struggled to eat more than this. 
Here we go again, Day 3 of 4 with Lord Clive of 
On 
I went up to the counter to give the Order to a young Chap, a very young Chap. He was coping with the Telephone Orders, now for Hector. Withholding the Pineapple in the Dhansak was noted. Lamb Karahi without 
A plateful of Lamb and Potato was presented in a Blended, Reddish Masala. This was a Standard Curry resembling nothing that I have ever eaten at 
Nippy – was Mags’ overture.
One can tell immediately if a Karahi Gosht is going to impress, this most certainly did. The Masala-Meat Ratio was towards Dry, no Soup here, no 
The initial eating was tentative, everything was hotter than everything else. The Spice hit instantly, this was – Spicy. The Seasoning was right up there. The Masala was Tomato-rich, possibly Tomato-based. And the Flavour…. It is Hector’s turn to mention the 
Counting the Meat was impossible, there was simply too much to count. The Tender Lamb tasted as if it belonged to the Masala. No Bones, had this Karahi had Lamb on-the-bone it would have been off the scale. 
Behold a Yellow Masala with specks of Tomato and Herb. Had Chickpeas replaced the Pineapple? The Lentils, I conclude, must have been particularly – Large.
A Dhansak with a bite this, oh yes. 
How much Curry will Hector eat this week? With Lord Clive of 
Clive and Hector arrived early, Naveed commented on our punctuality. We decided to wait for our Fellow Diners rather than embark on the Starters early. At 15.00, Shahbaz was bringing out the Poppadoms, Dips, Spiced Onions and Salad. These were accompanied by four Hot Plates. It is January, 
Namkeen Karahi and Lamb Chops Achari with Methi – 
With Methi! – I exclaimed – Wonderful!
Something Happened
Clive’s phone rang, a call he had been waiting for. He will not be returning to work on Monday. As of this afternoon – Lord Clive of Crawley is Retired! This was now his – Retiral Dinner. What better place could there be? Today would be memorable, and not just for this being the #99 Review of 
Only Hector in this group had previously experienced the joy that is Lamb Chops Achari. With the Chops piled high in the Karahi then smothered in a Pickle and Methi-rich Masala, this was going to be some treat. Whilst completing the photographic ritual and updating my notes, Jim was ahead in the eating stakes. It took Jim a few moments to adjust to and then recognise – Pickle. The – Wow! – factor was there. The Chops were Tender, not the Tandoori Chops that many venues consider to be appropriate. Having taken three on my first sweep, it became evident that our quota was four each. Managing four Chops was not a problem but then one has to consider the Mass of Masala. The Hector Strategy was to use fingers, others used cutlery. The Chapatti for the Masala, the Chops eaten as they must be. My Dentist might be reading this. Care was taken, ah, the pile of Bones. All this and Methi too.
Jim and Alan had this last month for the first time, it was a no brainer that we would be having this again. Served on-the-bone to extract as much Flavour as possible from the most simple of Recipes, the Seasoning was at the top of the scale. Bones, Seasoning, Flavour, – The Curry Triumvirate – the antithesis of – Bland. 
Hector prefers to dine in Curry Cafes not Pukka Restaurants, Banana Leaf makes no attempt at being posh. The open kitchen reveals all, with everthing visible, the ambience is zero. Mein Host even commented on how cold it was inside. The banner from 2011 commemorating 
Two standard pots of Basmati were presented, Decent/
Kohzi Takkali Curry
Clive thoroughly enjoyed his Chicken Curry so there is little need for Hector to make further comment. Those who like that sort of thing, like that sort of thing. A Soupy Curry with the Chicken protruding, I conclude there was a decent Meat Portion here also. 
The Grunting Growler is across the street, irresistible. Mein Host there informed us that people regularly buy Draught Bier and take it across to Banana Leaf who have a BYOB policy.
Hector is not a great fan of Lunchtime Menus, if one is out for Curry then have – The Full Bhuna. However, the portion sizes at 
Hot plates were provided, the Rice arrived on an even hotter plate. Rather than decant, I placed the Rice Plate on top of the Dinner Plate and let Mother deal with the rest. The Quantity of Basamti was Ideal, who needs more than this?
This was a simple Curry with Blended Masala and four decent sized pieces of Meat. The Masala-Rice Ratio was not Excessive, the Lamb was Tender. Mother Kept prodding the Meat, I couldn’t fathom why. She was expecting Bones, one pays extra for Lamb on-the-bone at Lunchtime. 
*
I only recall having Keema at 
The Waiter was eager to ensure we would have our choices, Tender Lamb was not a problem. I liked the given description and so enquired about the Handi (£10.95), a Dish which can through experince, be anything the Chef designs. The Waiter was positive that this would meet my requirements. I thought Marg might go for an Interesting Korma, she had already decided upon the Nashilee (£10.95). A Chapatti (£1.00) for Marg and a Plain Paratha (£2.50) completed the Order. 
Two long tables were set adjacent to where we sat, the corresponding groups arrived and the complex task of taking their Order got underway. This would give me the Opperchancity to see many more Dishes later in our visit. The arrival of our Order was heralded by the Mature Waiter uttering his distinctive mantra:
Marg’s Karahi appeared to be filled with an interesting mix of Meat and Fruit, featuring large pieces of Mango with Tomatoes and a Fresh Coriander Garnish. The Masala was pleasingly Thick and certainly not Excessive. 
A bit chewy, the Lamb – was an early comment. 
Once more the blended Masala was pleasingly – Thick. The Heat of the Karahi was established accidentally, ouch, the contents were also – Hot! The Meat was plentiful, I counted ten Large cut pieces, none were as – chewy – as Marg had implied in the Nashilee. Sadly, it was most evident that Meat and Masala were strangers until moments before presentation; the Meat was giving off no sense of Spice whatsoever. As I ate I waited for the Masala Spice to kick in, this never happened. This Curry was in no way demanding. The Ginger Strips and discrete Larger Pieces of Onion in the Masala offered a slight diversity in Texture. There was an underlying Fruity Flavour giving a slight Sweetness, this was in no way – Strong. 
My choice of venue for the first Glasgow Curry of 2018 cannot be a surprise, however, the choice of Curry-Heute may be. When Hector visits 
Arriving at 14.40, Shahbaz was manning the ship, he talked me through my options. One always hopes that the 
The Vegetable Rice was piled high on the plate. Peas, Cauliflower and Mushrooms featured in this Melange. Tasty in its own right, I reckoned I would manage this, just. 
I made space in the centre of the Rice and started decanting the Lamb and Chickpeas. Sliced Green Chillies were also in the Shorva, this was a significantly different Curry for Hector at 
This was closer to a Northern Quarter (
The Chickpeas were even more numerous than first realised, I had to accept that Part 2 was Chickpea on Vegetable Rice, I had no problems with this, – Large Lentils – is what they looked like. Was I actually having a Daal Gosht variant? I had come in the hope of finding Something Different, mission accomplished.
The Shorva had long been absorbed by the Vegetable Rice, for the endgame I was engaging in effect with a Moist Biryani, Very Pleasant, I knew I would finish this perfect combination, then Naveed sneaked up behind me…
Here I go again, eating to my limit at 
For the first UK Curry of 2018, Hector is in Manchester. Manchester Airport may not be the most gemutlich of departure points, however, the ease of access from Scotland coupled with very attractive ‘plane and train fares make it worthy. The City of Manchester in its own right has featured increasingly in Curry-Heute since my first visit to the Manchester Beer Festival back in 2010.
Marg fancied a Wrap for a change. Peri Peri Chicken (£3.80) was her brave sounding selection. Rio Tropical (£0.90) was Marg’s choice of Drink, as Sparkling Water was not available, Tap Water for Hector.
To Hector, this looked very – peely wally – and nothing like as intense as say Nando’s. 
Three plastic containers were lined up before me, Bread was clearly not present. I had time to take a photo before further engagement.
The Food was visibly – Hot – so Complaint #1 averted. 
I dipped a piece of Paratha into the Delhi Achari Lamb, a Decent Kick and a worthy Level of Seasoning were the first positives of this evening’s visit for Hector. I had to remind myself that – Pickle – was part of this Curry. There was a semblance of Achari, little more initially. Marg amused herself by Dipping in too.
My last Paratha
Here was a Thicker but still Blended Masala. The Spice Level did register, the Seasoning was woefully lacking. An Earthy Flavour at best is all that was attained. 
With all customers served, Our Chap came over to enquire about how I was finding the meal. I had to ask how the Bombay Aloo could be so different from my last visit. He asked when I was last here – 
Hector will be back at 