On Day three of the Glasgow Real Ale Festival (G-RAF 2016), Hector is attending as a paying customer, this means Bunkers are required afore. Charing Cross was the chosen locus, it is Ramadan, nowhere was open. Having survived both the Disappointment and a Deluge, the No. 3 Bus was boarded, this would take me to the South Side. As Charcoals in Renfield St. came into view I decided to re-visit their other branch. There was logic in this.
Charcoals Cafe (74 Trongate, Glasgow, G1 5EP) is on the southern end of the Merchant City Curry House Cluster, not an area where I have found Outstanding Curry. I chose the return to Charcoals Cafe as it is nearest to The Briggait and therefore the Beer Festival.
It is one day short of two years since I was last here, Marg went to Wales for Hockey that day, today her Scotland Veterans beat Wales 4-0. Hector has been retired for exactly one year.
Entering at 14.30, a Delivery Chap was packing his bike, two Diners only were inside. I was offered any seat but the table nearest the door was suggested. I chose to go further inside.
The Menu was in three parts, a Lunch Menu, the Main, and a Pre-Theatre (£9.95). Lunch ended at 14.00, it was now Pre-Theatre time. Normally I do not consider these – Offers – in fear that the Portion Size suffers. Achari Balti only appeared in the Pre-Theatre Menu. In the past two days I have had Karahi Gosht and Keema Mutter Aloo, both at the New Karahi Palace, time for something different. Anticipating Mainstream Curry, Fried Rice should be a suitable Accompaniment. For the Starter it had to be Lahore Fish Pakora.
The Waiter took the order then returned to verify it was Lamb Achari Balti I required. There was time to take in my surroundings. Seating around forty five inside, there were tables outside on the pavement, how European. Does Brexit mean we shall have to cease this practise? A Couple came to the door and asked if they could have Coffee outside, not a problem. As would become apparent through my visit, the Staff were particularly polite.
The Lahore Fish Pakora had me won instantly. Four Large Pieces, twice what one would receive in the West End. Encased in a Fresh Coriander-rich Spicy Batter, this was as Light as only Fish Pakora could be. The Seasoning was Perfect. The Spicy Dip was accompanied by a Soupçon of Salad containing Cucumber, Radish, Carrot, Tomato, Lemon, Capsicum, Onion and Lettuce. This was a very well presented Starter, thoroughly enjoyable.
I was asked if I would like my Main Course straight away, I asked for a few minutes. Again this level of service was appreciated.
The appearance of two metal pots heralded the arrival of the Achari Balti and Fried Rice. The Quantity of Rice was Sensible, indeed this made me immediately count the pieces of Lamb, eight, and they were Large. As I have come to learn at their original premises, one does not leave Charcoals hungry.
The Masala was suitably Thick, more than I would normally desire, hence the Rice to soak it up. The Pickle Flavour was not in-the-face, but was there. The Spice and Seasoning were were within acceptable parameters, here comes the – But. It was obvious that the Lamb and Masala were strangers until a few minutes previously, there was no sense of Spice or Flavour having been infused into the Meat. This was Lamb with a Sauce rather than the hoped for experience. This is what I call a Mainstream Curry.
Why did I not spot the Jhatpat? This does look like something special indeed. I had better return, quickly.
The Bill
£13.45. £1.00 extra for Lamb. Overall, good value considering the Portion Size, especially the Fish Pakora.
The Aftermath
A Calling Card was left without comment. Mein Host bade me farewell and asked if I had enjoyed my Meal.
The Fish Pakora was the standout – I informed him.
It is Day two of the
In the time it took to make the Chapatti, the Meal was ready and brought over. It was strange to be eating from a Bowl instead of my normal Karahi. The Large pieces of Potato and the Liberal Fresh Coriander stood out, here we go. Mince, Potatoes and Peas, it’ll never catch on. There was the most Minimal Oil present, and no Masala, as Dry as Curry can be, however, there was still an underlying Moistness, Perfect.
The Bill
The 
Hector’s Lamb Karahi was presented soon afterwards. The Heat was evident, the Hot Oil sizzled. As I have written many times, I am bewildered as to why the mouth can tolerate temperatures that the fingers cannot. Hot Food is where it’s at: Hot Food cools to levels of tolerance, Cool Food tends rapidly towards the inedible.
Today’s Lamb Karahi appeared to have more Masala, and a Thinner one too. The Lamb on-the-bone was piled high, piece by piece was savoured. As the top layer was removed, so the Masala resembled the Norm, Thicker, Herb-rich. The complexity of the Oil-Masala-Herb Mash is what sets this interpretation of Lamb Karahi apart from the rest. The Fresh Green Chilli Topping added extra bite. This is Pleasure.
The single Chapatti was not quite finished proving that one substantial Chapatti is enough. The karahi was wiped clean, should I come back here for my break tomorrow?
Marg declared it was time we took Mother out for Curry, again. My suggestions were vetoed, Marg wished – Ambience – so Curry Cafes were dismissed, it had to be a Mainstream Restaurant. The Alishan ticks all the boxes, the fish tanks at the entrance are what makes this a memorable venue for Marg, for Hector it is the Pholan Devi.
That was lovely – was the verdict. The Tenderness of the Lamb was remarked upon, the temperature of the plate was not. Many a Curry outing has got off to a poor start when cold plates were presented. Mother was wondering who she could bring here, looks as though she’ll be back.
The Lamb Karahi was Boneless, I have not found on-the-bone to be an option at The Alishan. For once I was not able to sample this, Marg ate the lot which is quite unusual for her. The Naan did not appear to be as ridiculously large as memory serves. 
Since the Pholan Devi was first encountered, there is no denying that Hector takes much more to impress. I have never not enjoyed a Curry served at The Alishan, however, to achieve – The Wow – takes something special. Marg’s reheated leftover Lamb Balti did manage this the morning after our 
Ali placed a platter of Saag/Palak beside the Pholan Devi. This is not what I had asked for, I had not made it clear. I now know I have to ask for uncooked Dry Methi. Essentially I had a Curry with a Side of Herbs. The Toppings of Spring Onion and Fresh Coriander on the Pholan Devi were quite Modest therefore in comparison.
The Palak was offered to my Co-diners. Mother could not take to it, her first encounter. Marg had a Soupçon. By adding the Palak on to my own plate, bit by bit, I was in effect giving myself even more Masala without Meat. Cue the Naan. Without the Garlic and Coriander Naan my meal would have suffered, this provided a suitable base on which to mop up the Masala and Palak. In terms of Flavour, the Palak was not particularly potent. Is eating Dry Methi straight from the box a healthy option? It works very well as a Topping.
Both Ladies had Ice Cream. Alishan also offer the bought in Toy Desserts, for lack of a better description, 
In The Tropics, the variance between daylight hours and darkness is not significant. In the high temperate latitudes the sun sets for only a few hours in June. There are also extended periods of twilight which are unknown in The Tropics. In short, this is not a good time of year to have Ramadan.
Those in front of us were distracted by Salads, Dips and Dates, yes Dates. Hector was not falling for this, hang on, the Spiced Onions, too tempting. Heading straight for the Mains was considered, however, these were still covered. Kassif and Mr. Baig were maintaining the now established tradition of serving The Best Bits.
One piece of Vegetable Pakora, and some elongated Fish Pakora found their way on to my plate. Shami Kebab? – asked Mr. Baig. Two please. A Chicken Wing and some Chicken Sikh Kebap filled the plate.
Approaching Our Chap, we could see that still there was nowhere to sit, I pointed up to the Balcony. He nodded, up we went. Eight other Diners were tucking in, we still found a table to ourselves.
The Chicken Wing was the poorest part of my selection, just Chicken. The Shami Kebap was the standout, the Seasoning hit home. Marg too was taken by this. The Fish Pakora was Tasty too, completely different from any other encountered to date, a Lighter Batter, and appropriately Spiced.
It should come as no surprise that Marg’s appetite was sated after her Mountain of Starters. One should really consider coming to the Ramadan Buffet for Starters one night and Mains on another. Hector has employed this strategy previously.
The Lamb was Tender in both, I lost track of which was which in the Soupy Mass on my plate. The Saag added to the Liquid content. Rice would have made the plate look more like Curry, however I planned to go for more. What’s this? Green Capsicum, on my plate, from where?
The Bill
Her brother, Kassif, was still smiling. I had to ask what his window of eating was at this time.
Eight short lines permitted access to the site. Every bag was searched, except Jonathan’s. I was happy when I had to produce the solid object in mine, my big backup phone battery.
Scott Gorham carries the name, yet he is not an original member. Gary Moore was there once too.
With a Jug of Becks, he looked throughout Manfred Mann set to his rear left, was he The Show? He thought so. Chatter, chatter, chatter, why bother coming? Oh, he’s paying attention now, gyrations, talk about invading one’s space? I was not a Happy Hector.
A space opened up six to my right when a Chap puked over all around him. Welcome to Germany!
Ritchie Blackmore’s Rainbow
The set list from last night was already known to us, thirteen songs, a couple I would not have chosen, but The Hits have to be played, especially in an event such as this.
Highway Star began with minimal Guitar, vocals leading. We all know the magnificent fretboard sounds at the start of Made in Japan, you either repeat this exactly or do something totally different. I walked out of a Deep Purple Gig once when Tommy Bolin made a total hash of this song.
Accompanying The World’s Greatest Guitarist this evening were: Vocals – Ronnie Romero (Lords of Black), Keyboards – Jens Johansson (Stratovarius), Bass – Bob Nouveau (ex-Blackmore’s Night), Drums – David Keith (Blackmore’s Night), Backing Vocals – Candice Night (Blackmore’s Night) and presumably the other Lady from Blackmore’s Night.
The setlist: Highway Star (Deep Purple), Spotlight Kid (Rainbow), Mistreated (Deep Purple), Sixteenth Century Greensleeves (Rainbow), Since You’ve been gone (Rainbow) . Man on the Silver Mountain (Rainbow), Difficult to Cure (Deep Purple), Catch the Rainbow (Rainbow), Perfect Strangers (Deep purple), Stargazer (Rainbow), Long Live Rock ‘n’ Roll (Rainbow), Child in Time (Deep Purple), Black Night (Deep Purple), Smoke on the Water (Deep Purple), one song more than last night at the Loreley. It was dry tonight, apparently the crowd was soaked last night. We were prepared.
Taking the stage in twilight, the 21st Century Rainbow lighting effects impressed immediately and only became better as darkness fell. The sound was perfect, the Hammond (?) organ and Fender Strat recreating the familiar grinding sounds that Deep Purple in particular, were noted for.
One has to wonder if Jens Johansson had to work all this out for himself, or are all of the keyboard settings noted? The heaviest organ sound was during his keyboard solo, it was interesting when the camera closed into reveal it was the synthesiser which was creating this magnificent sound.
Ronnie Romero looked the part. Hector had wondered about the lyrics, which version of the Rainbow songs would be sung. Ronnie James Dio added improvised vocals to the extended endings, thankfully this Ronnie was up for it.
An hour into the set and Hector had a problem. Having stood in the Hector at a Rock Gig stance for approaching three hours, the legs had seized. When I wiggled my toes my head started to go. If The Hector did not get out of here, he would be carried out. Those around me looked mystified as I made my way to the tower. Behind the tower I realised I needed to go for a walk and get the circulation going. Those who I was notionally with this evening spotted the yellow polo shirt, I knew where to return to.
Difficult to Cure had ironically just got underway, Coke, the great cure-all, not available. Bier, not required. Eis Cafe, this should have caffeine and sugar. Returning to Les Autres, Jim was horrified when I suggested I would have – to dance – for the rest of the Gig. By this it was keep the legs, feet and toes all moving. It was touch and go. Jonathan knew he would be suffering when it was time to walk back to the station. This was a good time for a timeout, the drum solo.
Stargazer was played earlier than anticipated, a much slowed down version. Child in Time too felt slowed down. Ritchie loves to play quietly, at volume, mesmerising. Smoke on the Water was the inevitable encore, again starting without – the riff. Fireworks accompanied the chorus, then the first drops of rain, just a few.
The walk back for the delayed train featured audio snippets of the Gig, how many people had recorded minute segments or more? The DVD should be out hopefully before the year is over. 12,000 people, where had they gone? Those waiting for the 23.35 all squeezed on at midnight.
Wandering through Viktualienmarkt just to add a deviation, I spotted the only 
*
Fluids
The Vegetable Masala Madras had the appearance of something worthwhile, far from Shorva, Thick with Tomato Seeds and Minimal Masala, in The Hector Style. Potatoes, Cauliflower, Tomatoes, Courgettes, and Carrots all featured, with Ginger Strips and Fresh Coriander toppings. The Vegetables were all cooked as I would wish them, a slight Firmness, who wants Pulped-Vegetables?
The Kick was Serious, Peppery. As I ate, I knew that others would be reaching for Liquid by now, never a smart move. This was one hell of a Spicy Curry! When the Ginger Blast came from the Strips, I realised just how little Flavour this Dish had. The Seasoning was almost non-existent, this may have been the root of the disappointment.
The
Arriving at 12.20, I was very aware that back in Glasgow, The Company were at 
Other news has reached me in the last few hours, the 
Fisch Chettinad or Lamm Chettinad? – asked Jolly.
The Replacement Samsung informed me that at noon today, the temperature would be 12ºC with – Freezing Drizzle. I was out in a t-shirt, the sun was shining, the temperature continually rising. Tomorrow night, rain is forecast, let’s hope the accuracy is just as poor as today’s.
This is it, one of the most Outstanding Curry Experiences known to The Hector. Those who have read these pages before know that what is served at 
The Spice Level was just right, not excessive, though some may have struggled. With Fish Curry, the Seasoning should never be an issue. The Smokey Flavour from Red Chillies is the norm, I could see only Green Chillies today, so I have to wonder what else Chef is adding, the recipes are Mrs. Kunjappu’s, Jolly’s Mother. The Plain Rice is now served in a Sensible Portion, the wastage of previous years no more. However, the Curry is served in the same smaller bowls, so Portion Sizes have shrunk overt the years. The Prices have remained constant.
Did I tell you how Wonderful it was?
This may belong on 
The Lamm Chettinad (€14.95) looked virtually identical to that served at Lunchtime.
Even without Fish, the Seasoning was spot on, the same Ingredients bar one, a similar Experience, the same Gritty Texture, yet Quite Different. It is worth trying both just to verify this.
Chai is always offered and rejected. Milk in Tea?
Knowing that Marg would collect me later, and that Food was required, I resolved to visit 
I was invited to sit on a leather chair but was happy where I was. I had to verify which Son I was dealing with – I’m well down the line – was his humble admission.
Could Russia secure three points in their opening match of Euro 2016? We had watched some of the first half, signal permitted, on the Replacement Samsung. I asked if there was wi-fi, there is – Yay. FYI – Mintchochip.
outlaws in 
The Lamb Desi was presented in a Black Cast Iron Karahi – Piping Hot – yet it is remarkable how quickly these receptacles cool. The Chapatti was Modest and Quartered, not the greatest Girth I have encountered. I was about to Dip into the Oil which collects around the mash, there was none. This was a true Dry and Thick Masala. Was Hector happy? The Masala was closer to Palak/Saag than the preferred Masala with Methi. Perhaps I have to instruct as I do in Helensburgh where Chef Rashid at the 
The Tender Lamb was plentiful. Fingers were used to eat the Meat, the Chapatti employed to scoop the Mash. Yes, more Seasoning required.
Akhtar entered, still in his jacket, he came over to say – Good Evening. Surely around 22.00 people would come out to dine? He saw I was watching the Football. England scored just as I finished my Lamb Desi.
The plentiful Tender Lamb was decanted, the photo ritual completed. There was much more than just Lamb and Masala here. Topped with crunchy Spring Onions, more Mushrooms, Whole Chillies, Tomatoes and a Vegetable I could not identify, were mixed through the Thick Masala. Khadu was a possibility, whatever, these were welcome inclusions, a Variety of Vegetables is always welcomed, and no sign of the 
The Bones were few, the meat content more than Sufficient. Although there was a decent Earthy Flavour from the Lamb Desi, there was a distinct need for more Seasoning. The Spice Level was not noted initially, when I came across the Chillies so the impact was registered. A Big Hit!