Hector’s last Curry in Koblenz was a decade or so ago sitting in a Curry House next door to Bei Bernd when Deutschand took the lead over England. By the time we had finished our meal a certain Liverpool striker was scoring for fun, we had to convince the Locals that Scots were suffering as much as them.
That Venue has gone, Koblenz currently has two Curry houses, the Taj Mahal and the India Palace (Casino Strasse 1A, 56068 Koblenz, Deutschland), the latter looked more promising based on Other Sources. Hector was surprised when Dr. Stan and Lord Clive of Crawley both agreed to join me for a Lunchtime Curry. At 13.10, we were the first customers of the day.
A Large Bottle of Sparkling Water would be shared, the Menu and the Lunchtime Menu were perused. €8.50 for the Fisch Curry off the latter, or go a la carte? Machi Masala drew the attention, however, when Dr. Stan declared Karahi Gosht, that was it. Clive chose the Fisch.
Many of the Dishes mentioned Peppers in the English Translation, I attempted to make it clear to Mein Host that no Capsicum should be included. Minimal Sauce was also declared, there was the feeling that he was not in tune, or even listening.
All Curry have sauce -was his reply to – Which Curry Dishes have least Sauce?
Was this the only Turban-wearing Waiter without English or German?
As ever on the continent, all dishes come with Boiled Rice. Spicy please.
Shorba
German Menus have Shorba as the heading for the Soup section, this is good, a suggestion that the Curry will not be Soup. Clive was given a Bowl of Soup as part of his Lunchtime Menu. Dr. Stan and Hector were supplied with Cumin laden Poppadoms and Dips. No Tamarind today, back to the runny Mango Chutney.
A very salty potato soup – was Clive’s description, Hector should have had the Lunchtime Menu.
Karahi Gosht
One has to accept that Karahi Gosht can be anything The Chef wishes it to be. That what is served is up to the standard of The Hector Curry is usually in hope, rather than expectation, when visiting a new venue. What came was Light, Thin, Peely Wally. The Masala looked as if was from the South of India, Coconut would not have been a surprise. Coconut was not mentioned in the description for the Karahi Gosht, nor was Capsicum, Hector was presented with a Capsicum Curry accompanied by some Lamb. Six Pieces of Lamb, eight pieces of Assorted Capsicum. As our dog did when presented with something suspicious, each of the pieces was carefully removed from the Curry and a circle of Capsicum was created around the edge of the dinner plate. Dr. Stan ate on regardless, yet he had ordered the same as Hector. Not a single – Mmmmm.
The Thinnest of Masalas was woefully under-seasoned. The Spice Level did not even register on the Scale of Spiciness. Having removed the Capsicum, there was not a lot left, the Ginger Strips were the only source of Real Flavour. Disappointed? This was a very poor Curry.
Dr. Stan was asked for his verdict – The lamb is tender. He would later refer to the Lamb Stew he had for lunch.
Fisch Curry
Meanwhile Clive was thoroughly enjoying his Midday Special – Fisch Curry. The Masala looked to be the same as served in the Karahi Gosht yet Clive was able to praise the Spice Level. Potently spiced, the fish is extremely good, the creamy masala has a good consistency, far from being soup. Hector should have ordered the Fisch Curry.
At no time did the Waiter come to check on our progress. Two other Diners had arrived, he was hardly run off his feet.
The Bill
€37.50. We should all have had the Two Courses for €8.50.
The Aftermath
The Waiter was shown the Ring of Capsicum. There was little more than shrug when I pointed to the Offending Vegetable and reminded him I wished no Peppers.
The Calling Card was given, the Website shown. The term – Curry-Heute needs no explanation in The Fatherland.
Stewart texted later, try – Ohne Paprika. We shall see.
Time to take Dr. Stan to Deutches Eck.
The Khyberi bore no resemblance to anything that might be cooked in this region, it was simply Lamb Curry. The Standard Masala was not excessive, the Basmati soon soaked this up. An Onion-based Masala, this was not the Mash that could have been presented given the
Having withheld the Capsicum, there was an Overload of Onion Chunks, for the second time in a week, Hector started piling Onions on the side of the plate. Fresh Tomatoes and Ginger Strips had been added before presentation, these at least gave Diversity. There was a sufficiency of Meat, one accepts it was Lamb, slightly firm, but still Tender The Seasoning was below the Hector Preference, but the Kick was more than adequate. The Overall Flavour was somewhere back in time, Pleasant, but not Outstanding. Time to stir in the Tamarind and Pickle. Oh yes, now we have a Curry.
A Monday in Stirling catching up with Kenneth, who is not the Mythical Character some have claimed over the years. Curry-Heute was a matter of course, the Venue had not been discussed, the inclement weather meant that the nearest Curry House to where the taxi dropped us had a chance. Rana’s (37 Friars Street, Stirling FK8 1HA) had the Magic Term – Punjabi – etched on the window, the Hector Curry could be a possibility.
Two other tables were occupied. The layout gave an air of – Spaciousness. With partitions separating the wall tables, larger settings were mid-room, a group of six arrived as we completed our meal. Tablecloths were ubiquitous, Posh.
Once upon a time, Marks and Spencer sold Portions of Chicken Tikka Masala – for Two. This was quite a treat. They then added Rice and reduced the Portion to – for One. This was perhaps a decade and a half ago. Who would admit to buying this now, eh, Kenneth, eh?
Earthy – once more best describes this Curry Experience. We’re off to a good start then. The Masala was suitably Thick but way in excess of what was required, even with Rice to maintain the interest. The Mushroom Rice also added to the Overall Flavour, properly cooked Mushrooms, far from the tinned variety simply chucked in and served.
The Waiter asked the Customary Question. I could not fault this Dish.
It was 21.00 when the order was placed. Ayaz took a Large Karahi upstairs. Takeaways were sent out, some collected. Chef Rashid was being kept busy. Another Large Karahi went upstairs. Normally when the upstairs is busy one hears the footsteps, all was quiet. Hector had to investigate. A Family of Four Adults with maybe four young children had just been catered for. Another Group sat at the window table, Two Chaps sat at the table at the top of the stairs. Only the Family had Food.
Meanwhile across the table, Hector was in the full frenzy. A Half Kilo turned out to be Eight Chops shrouded in the 
Friday may just be another day in Hector’s week, but some traditions persist, Curry-Heute pre-Bier.
The Waiter looked familiar but there was no sense of recognition from him. Polite in the extreme, he took the order and noted – No Green Pepper – but had to ask what – What was the other thing? – in reference to Capsicum. He returned moments later to enquire about the required level of Spice – Spicy is good.
The wait was not long, a Plate of Earthy Rice accompanied the Bowl of Tawa. The latter was not the expected Light, Yellowish Colour. Less Yoghurt had been added so the Masala was less Soupy and much Thicker than would have been served back in the Halcyon Days of 
The Seasoning was Spot-on though the Dish was only Moderately Spiced, so much much for – Spicy is good. The underlying Flavour was very Familiar, Comforting, this was a Curry born in 
April 2016 Another one bites the dust… 
This was the perfect mid-afternoon snack. Snack? After Tuesday’s banquet at 
Mein Host, the most Modest Chef in Glasgow (?) only presented once the food was on the table. As one of the few who actually sits at the two available tables, he may have guessed who had been served.
As if this was not enough, the Largest Platter of Chicken Drumsticks ever seen was placed in the middle of the table. The Skin had been removed leaving White Chicken. This was very much in the style of cooking to follow. Jeera Chicken – was the nomenclature, Salt, Pepper, Cumin and a Fresh Coriander Garnish. To do this justice could run the risk of not being able to face the Karahi. This was Chicken, Simple, Sublime, Seriously Tasty.
It’s Red – was Bill’s admission soon after our arrival. There’s only three things in it. We would spend some time narrowing down the list. The essence of what Hector has come to know as – White Karahi – is the omission of Spices, especially Chili, Paprika, Cayenne et al.
A Vast Karahi containing possibly 2kg of Lamb on-the-bone caused a gasp. This is mine, yours will be along in a moment. As if…
Having 
Chust Sublime. Who ate the last piece of Vegetable Pakora also?
For those who still need convincing, the Bone Marrow adds an extra dimension to the Flavour. The Methi was mixed through the Masala rather than being just a Mass of Herbs as served in a Saag/Palak. The Seasoning was right up there, too intense maybe for some. Alan had asked for Fresh Green Chillies to be stirred in also, Rashid had not held back on the Spice. With the Tenderest of Lamb and Thickest of Masalas, this Curry was nothing short of Perfect. The 
Few venues serve a Larger Naan than the 
Marg’s Karahi Gosht was the little brother of what we had been served. The Lamb was very tender, lovely – was Marg’s platitude. She also reminded me how much she had enjoyed her Favourite Pakora. Meanwhile the mystery of Tracy and Lamb continued. She now eats Lamb Chops, but not Lamb, so Chicken Curry it is. Very good as always.
The Ladies had Doggy Bags, Hector left a bit of Masala, Alan cleared his Karahi. Four very Happy Diners.
The last day of a Real Ale Festival notoriously has limited availability, we were at the Surrey Oaks long enough to verify that the Ali Raj would in fact open today, and to peruse the on-line menu. My Fellow-diners have been to the Ali Raj only once, well one would hardly just be passing by. 
Maggie went for Surf and Turf – Chicken Sundorbon – Chicken and prawns, sweet and sour flavour. Not content with this, Saag Aloo was ordered as a Side, plus Lemon Rice.
Despite having arrived soon after opening time, there was already a substantial number of customers present. A large group sat in the rear – Kiddies Corner. The place was filling up. Having ordered no Starters I expected our Mains to arrive shortly after another table had their Starters, not the case. Time passed, The Full Robin, the Goldfish soothed. The Curry arrived.
Should have been grated – was her suggestion. Where was the Saag Aloo? This only appeared when The Waiter was reminded. A bit greasy on the side – was Maggie’s observation.
Every Grain of Rice was consumed, for once a Perfect-sized Portion. One Green Cardamom was left on the plate by the time I had finished. The Flavour was a Standout, Aromatic, reminiscent of the Rogan Josh served in the 
What was obviously Mein Host arrived halfway through our visit. Rather than give the Calling Card to The Waiter, I caught the eye of Mr. Ali, Mein Host. The Curry-Heute Website could not be shown due to a weak signal compounded by ongoing Vodafone-Samsung Issues.
e reminisced about the days of Bradford Curry when he used to eat Curry, Chapattis included, for £3.00. I had to congratulate Mr. Ali on the quality of Curry served here and promised that we will be back. The extent of the Bradford Connection was not fully established, here lies The Motherload.
