Day #2 of – Compare the Weihnachts Meerkatzen in Köln had to begin with Bunkers, i.e. Curry. Little India (Luxemburger Str. 42, 50674 Köln, Deutschland) has had quite a few reviews on other Sources in the past two years, the majority sound very suspicious, too good to be true. One also deduces that Little India has only been in operation since the middle of 2016.
A rendezvous with Dr. Stan and Steve at Chlodwigplatz was planned for 14.00. Working backwards, this meant a Curry @13.00 the very time – The Maybot – was due to stand up in Parliament for – PMQs. I entered Little India wearing earphones and soon had Sky News Live on the still reliable Huawei. Surely those who still desire Brexit are now very much in the minority? As long as Teresa maintains, we shall not have an Opperchancity for Vote #2.
Nobody was front of house, the place was a bit of a mess, tables not cleared and a pile of glasses in a basin on the Bar. Had somebody had a Lassi Party the night before? I took a seat at a table near the Bar and adjacent to a Chap who was dressed for Business, he busied himself in his papers. A Chap came from the kitchen, the Menu was brought. The Menu was simple, I had a choice from ten Lamb Dishes. Some were described as – tender boneless – but none actually mentioned – on-the-bone. When nothing really grabs me I resort to Vindaloo, at least one can assess the courage of the Chef to present a Spicy Curry.
I asked for Lamb Vindaloo (€11.90) and a Fanta (€2.40). Only Lamm Masala (€11.20) mentioned – Capsicum – I decided to take the risk. The Waiter brought the Fanta with a straw in the bottle, I asked for a glass. Straws are for children, why waste plastic, how do you taste a drink if it goes straight down the back of your throat?
A basket with pieces of Poppadom and four Dips were provided, no plate. The Dips had either been carelessly dished up or I was not the first person to use this array, judging by the splashes around three of the four pots. Still, Poppadoms with Cumin Seeds and Tamarind still excite the Hector, I ate about half of the Poppadoms.
Meanwhile back at – PMQs – The Maybot was repeating the same script ad nauseam regardless of what she was asked. Someone should put a Bill through Parliament such that ministers have to actually answer questions. JC even showed a bit of grit until the Speaker interrupted his flow. And so the value of Sterling continues to drop.
I summoned a second Fanta.
The Curry arrived, the Rice on the same plate as the Curry which is OK for a Lunchtime Special. There was a near empty metal pot on the table next to me that suggested Rice can be served otherwise. Was there in fact an alternative Menu which I had not been given?
The Curry was not the only arrival. Two fruit flies kept coming over to investigate. When these were replaced by a common housefly, I had to wonder if there was a connection between these and the amount of dirty crockery lying around. Still, flies in mid-December?
Eight Large pieces of Meat and four pieces of Potato sat in what was very much a Standard Masala with perhaps a bit too much – Redness – to it, though that could have been down to Spices alone. It took a few moments for the Spice from the Dips to subside and those from the Masala to register on the palate. The Kick from the Masala came through but the Meat was giving off no sense of Spice or Flavour other than a sense of – Beefiness – which of course a Lamb Curry shouldn’t.
The Seasoning was OK, the Overall Flavour not complex. I managed most of the Rice. I can never bring myself to mix the left and right side of a plate, Curry goes on top of Rice, not beside. This was another classic Euro-Curry, competent, no more.
The Bill
€15.70 (£10.54) Before the Brexit Vote (#1?) this would have cost £8.86.
The Aftermath
The Chap who had served me had sat beside the Businessman, the Accountant (?) throughout much of my visit. On introducing – Curry-Heute – and mentioning Scotland, both became interested. I was asked for a verdict on the Curry:
It was OK.
Permission was granted to take the photos of the premises, note the debris still on the tables. The Reader can make up his/her own mind, but if one wishes to visit a Curry Cafe in Köln then Hector strongly recommends the nearby – Indian Curry Basmati House.
