It takes skill, or three months, to manage four diaries simultaneously, hence the time lapse since Alan, Tracy, Marg and Hector last dined together. The rendezvous was The World Famous Bon Accord due to its proximity to one of Charing X’s finest Curry Houses – Akbar’s (573-581 Sauchiehall St, Charing Cross, Glasgow, G3 7PQ). It was The Helensburgh Couple’s choice to return to the Bradford Curry Chain in Glasgow. Outstanding Curry was anticipated.
The booking was for 19.45, we were punctual which does introduce the risk having to wait for our table. A familiar face greeted us, Imran, the original Maitre d’ is back. We were shown to our window table immediately. Danial introduced himself, our Waiter for this evening.
There would be Lamb Chops (£3.95), these are a must at Akbar’s. Three Portions, Marg would have a Poppadom whilst we indulged. The latter would be charged. Sometimes they are Complimentary.
Hector had two Dishes picked out. The Outstanding Roshan Lal (£9.95) has been enjoyed here on a few occasions. On a previous visit my Tweak was denied – It’s already in. The Karahi Gosht (£7.45) is a worthy fallback. Danial summoned Imran, Mein Host declared it was nonsense to state that the Roshan Lal was not available without Capsicum. QED. A Plain Paratha (£2.50) would accompany, Parathas at Akbar’s are Special.
Alan chose the Karahi Gosht, Tracy – Karahi Chicken Palak (£7.45), both would have Chapatis. Marg went for Karahi Gosht Palak (£7.45), note, no extra charge for Lamb. Marg too would have her customary Chapati. £2.00 for a Chapati in a Bradford Chain? Shocking.
Normally the Waiter would state how long it would be for the Mains to arrive. Either this Ritual has been dropped, or has become meaningless when one orders a Starter.
Important!
At this point in Akbar’s, one has to make the Waiter aware that one does not wish to be served the Bland Glasgow version of their Fayre. One must ask for – Desi style, or Asian style. The Food will be served Spicy, this way one can experience a true Bradford Curry.
We are here – To Dine
When one is out with Alan and Tracy, this means the Sparkling Water is abandoned. Having accepted the Blandness of Kingfisher in India, drinking Cobra is no hardship. Maybe a Hops Overdose with Curry would be excessive. Though Rowing Jack with Curry in Warszawa was a Treat.
Alan is a Ciderman. Akbar’s do not have Draught Cider, buying Two Bottles to make the Pint is therefore extortionate. A Deal was done. They would bring Pints and charge at the Pint of Bier Rate – £3.95. One or two Pints would be consumed, as is the norm.
Lamb Chops
A Portion is Four, or Three by the time Marg has invaded my territory. The Three Portions arrived, Tracy sent hers back momentarily, they were decidedly underdone. Very seasoned– said Marg of her stolen Chop. The three Chops were Well-seasoned, the Spice on the tip of the tongue had – The Wow. When Tracy’s much improved Chops were returned – Very tasty when well fired. Marg received two Chapatis. All was well.
Best in Glasgow
During the interval, Hector was invited to take a photo of the trophy won by Akbar’s in the recent Curry Awards in which Hector was a Finalist for – Curry Lover of the Year. Akbar’s did win – Best Restaurant in Glasgow. What does this say about about the rest of Glasgow when a Bradford Chain wins? It may confirm my belief over the last twenty years, Bradford Curry is Best. The reality may be down to how the Curry Houses are chosen, or promote themselves. The Best Glasgow Curry Houses-proper are not put forward. are not put forward. Politics. Marketing. Sponsorship. Hector does not win Awards.
Karahi Chicken Palak
The Minimal Masala, the fact that the Spinach is strewn through the Meat, rather than the Dark Green Mass, made this Dish appealing even to The Hector. One day. Tracy enjoyed her selection – Absolutely tasty, I’m looking forward to breakfast tomorrow. Indeed, the Portions are deceptive, Doggy Bag required.
Karahi Gosht
This looks like a Bradford Curry, Small cut Meat, Thick Masala. As well as ‘complaining’ to Danial that there were no Rose Petals on the table, Alan has been allowed one further indulgence. It is nearly his 50th Birthday, and so he is permitted to describe his Meal thus – It was …. Nice. – a once in a lifetime indulgence. It lived up to expectations. A Restaurant can do no more.
Karahi Gosht Palak
Dark and Mysterious, this Dish was served too Spicy for Marg. Very rich, the meat was succulent, small bits, I liked that, but a bit too spicy for my taste-buds.
Roshan Lal
This I consider to be Akbar’s Signature Dish. This Dish was Seriously Spiced. The Masala was so Minimal, Thick, Dry, Classic Punjabi Cuisine, and nothing like anything served to Hector during the India Trip 2016. The Lamb was cut Bradford-small, the Meat went on forever. If the initial Dip of the Perfectly Layered Paratha impressed flavour-wise, then this was noting when one uncovered what lay beneath. The Bradford Taste emanated from the Base of the Karahi, others may not believe this, but Hector Loves Curry, this year, every year.
The Chapatis had Coffee (£2.50), The Chaps had other Liquids. Doggy Bags were arranged. Hector admits to adding some of his to Marg’s not dissimilar Dish. We had one full Karahi and one Empty Karahi at the end. The Portions at Akbar’s are Substantial. How can people eat a Starter and finish a Main Course?
The Bill
£88.90. £30.00 of this was a Drinks’ Bill, disgraceful. Still, without – The Cider Deal – it would have been worse. We were charged for one Chapati. Fair dos.
The Aftermath
Danial was praised, he had looked after us very well indeed.
Farewell to Imran, it is good to see him back. I hope he stays, Akbar’s Glasgow needs him.
Later at The State Bar
Alan and Tracy have signed up for the Wolf Strassenfest later this year. Their Co-traveller will be Mags, what were the chances?
28 Days Later
The Remnants of the Roshan Lal and Karahi Gosht were mixed and reheated. The Spice Level was at the top end of the scale. How did Marg eat any of hers?
Lamb Chops Balti (£17.99), only in Aberdeen. Hector has not had his Lamb Chops infusion for how long? When the Lottery Ticket comes up, perhaps, meanwhile one cannot help equate this to two Bradford Servings. Back in the Real World, Handi Masala Lamb (£11.99) was a more realistic prospect.
Hector!
Shri Bheema’s is doing well as an operation. Anitha contacted me later to give more information on their new branches in England.
The Makwali Fish Curry was Classic Fish Curry in a Strange Coloured Masala that surely must contain Coconut, Hector would never have ordered this. The Chicken Biryani came with some Masala and a second Dip, the British way. Chicken Biryani
Margery Sr. enjoyed the Fish – The fish was pleasant to eat. Marg had more to say – The fish was sweeter than I expected, very light and tasty. I took their word for it. I had the Hector Curry.
For reasons that remain unexplained, the Chicken Biryani was divvied on to two plates and a considerable quantity of Rice left in the bowl. The remnants were never touched despite Margery Sr. saying she could eat more. The Chicken Biryani was a great success.
This Dish has been thoroughly enjoyed on previous occasions. Marg once described it as the Best Curry she has ever had in Aberdeen, nothing to live up to then. My 
With just enough space to peel off the covers, once again The Main was a Triple, Rice in the Middle, separating Aloo Bhindi and a Bean Daal. I’m a prisoner at 30,000ft, I shall eat the Daal. There was a Small Chapatti to mop up as required.
A Salad!
Google Maps had thrown up Pebble Street as a possible venue. Menus were studied at a few locations, most places were Vegetarian. Rampur Kitchen (1st Floor, India Mall, New Friends Colony Community Hall, 
The Waiter brought the Menu which won me over immediately. The Curry would be served in Half or Full Portions. Unbelievably Hector considered the Half to be Sufficient.
The Lamb Curry, for I know not what the Waiter brought in the end, had the Thickest Masala encountered in 
The Vegetable Biryani had to be decanted first. Cauliflower, Green Beans, Red Carrot and Paneer were mixed through the Rice. Wonderful – was Marg’s comment on the Biryani. What has happened, we go to 
Marg’s Butter Chicken was everything she likes in a Curry, still? Chicken Tikka Masala may have been invented in 
Lacha Paratha
Late this afternoon The Group visited 
Tonight is the penultimate Indian Dinner, the last Indian Buffet in 
The Lamb Shank was on-the-bone as is the norm, the Sauce the customary Shorva. The Lamb tasted like Boiled Ham, there was no Seasoning I could taste, where was the Spice? This was Terrible!
The Bhindi Masala rescued what was already a Disappointing Meal, Full of Flavour, Very Dry, an Excellent Dish!
Pizza Hut will no doubt never appear again in the Curry-Heute Blog, however, the Menu deserves a special inclusion. Kadai, Kofta and Paneer, only in 
We were here to eat – Bland – Euro-Food. Black Olives with Pepperoni on a Deep Pan base, a Hector Pizza. No such luck today, the Veggie Supreme it had to be.
The size was perfect for sharing, as usual I ended up with the Larger Half. Our Chap finally brought the Sprite having been reminded – No Ice – for the third time. Not the best service. There’s more.
A pre-dawn rise, it might have been worth it. The first few hours of sunlight were spent at the expected highlight of the 
Fear not, Marg and Hector were transported with the rest of The Group back to the 
The Fish Cakes had me a bit excited. Fish Pakora is regarded by this Commentator as the Finest of Pakora. Fish Curry, when served well can be astonishing, as was experienced a few days ago at 
Having taken our seats at one of eight empty tables, the Menu was issued. Mutton Rogan Josh (Rs 310) was last seen at 
The Waiter let us choose our table, before doing so, I asked if they had Mutton and Bier. We took our seats.
Handi Gosht (Rs 450), a Classic. Hector first enjoyed this at Glasgow’s 
Vegetable Biryani
Paneer, Peas, Cauliflower and Green Beans were mixed through the Rice. A Meal in itself, but at home we would expect a Masala on the Side. It’s fab – said Marg, said in reply to my question. I can see us sharing this as an Alternative to the standard Vegetable Rice back in Blighty. As ever, there was way more than one person could eat. Just as well, given what follows.
The Waiter was keen to know if we were enjoying our Meal initially, then he sort of faded.
Lunch in an hour so would have been logical, however, those who do, decided that we had to visit this most 
The entire complex at 
A large table was set up for the Group of Twenty plus Guides. I took a seat furthest from the Breakfast Buffet, let The Others go first. I saw Adrian’s plate, that was it, today Hector is having an Indian Breakfast.
Sambhar, the few actual 
Having had – Bhaji – ‘explained’ in the 
Poori was the Bread of choice, something different. Hector The Adventurous, where’s my Karahi Gosht?
The Bill
The announcement was made, – Veg – would be a Vegetable Cutlet, – Non-Veg – would be an Omelette. No more Eggs for The Hector, I was also intrigued as to what a – Vegetable Cutlet – would be. I have never understood why Vegetarians go out of their way to make some of their Food resemble Meat. I also recall that no animal had ever been harmed in the creation of 
What does one do with this lot? Make a Sausage Sandwich! There was a Lovely Herb ad Spice Taste in the Ersatz Sausage, the Ketchup provided Moisture but spoiled the Overall Experience. Washed down with the Lime Water, the taste of the Coffee Sludge was erased.
A Meal on an Indian Train, – Tick. A pity we were not later in the day, I would have gone to visit the live Chickens in the kitchen before ordering Non-Veg.