Glasgow – Akbar’s – The 2015 Glasgow CAMRA Dinner

The evening of the Glasgow CAMRA Dinner sees thirteen appreciators of Real Ale gather to assemble what should be the Finest of Curry. Akbar’s (573-581 Sauchiehall St, Charing Cross, Glasgow, G3 7PQ) was the chosen venue, Bradford Curry served in Glasgow. Hector had no problems with this choice, it has been a while since the Roshan Lal has been enjoyed, last time it was a not so outstanding  Karahi Gosht that was served to The Hector.
Mein Host, Shiraz, greeted John and Hector on entry, we were directed to the rest of The Table.
John was determined to follow Hector’s lead – Roshan Lal without the Capsicum, served – Asian Style. One has to ask for this else a Glasgow Curry is served. I still have to question this system, but even in Bradford this is creeping in. One Curry for – Us -, the other for – Them? Dr. Stan and Howard also opted for the Roshan Lal. Katie, making her debut on Curry-Heute sat opposite Hector and adjacent to Tracey. Guessing Tracey’s Curry was simple – Gosht Paneer – meat cooked with traditional Indian cheese in a rich sauce. Ditto for Katie. Chris, on her right, chose Chicken and Spinach Balti. Beyond this lay other choices. Jonathan, at the far end of the table had his preferred Karahi Keema & Aloo Mutter.  Neither Dr. Stan or Jonathan could expect to fully enjoy their meal without the Curry-Heute Photographic Ritual.
Our Waiter this evening was Naveed. Drinks were being delivered to the the first arrivees as I took my seat beside Howard and Tracey at what would be our end of the table. Akbar’s do not sell any Bier Hector would drink. Some of The Table did order Lager, they should be kicked out of CAMRA! The Cider alternative is extortionate. I may have asked for the usual Sparkling Water, but at no time was I asked what I wished to drink, it became easier not to. Had I been bothered I would have asked.
We were addressed as  a table if we wished Poppadoms.
Are you giving or selling?
This took Naveed back. I will give them to you! – was his reply.
I don’t want any.
In the end, we managed to avoid the ludicrous surcharge for Poppadoms and Dips times thirteen. Dips were provided, for the Starters. Success.

Sundries
The Paratta (£2.50) served at Akbar’s is Reliable, very Flaky. John, still following the Hector lead ordered one too, as did Chris. Naveed announced he would bring Plain and Garlic Naans for The Table with an assortment of Rice. Mr. Boyd could enjoy his Rice without the outbreak of war.  The order complete, he returned to inform us that Capsicum was already in the Roshan Lal. The order for three stood, however, Hector as may have been mentioned, finds this Ballast to be abhorrent in Curry. The Hector Curry was changed to Lamb Karahi.  The Menu says Karahi Gosht comes with a few bones, it didn’t last time.

Starters
For Howard and Hector it had to be Lamb Chops, or – Chops (£3.95). Tracey chose the Seekh Kebab.

Two new Starters were chosen by those to my left. Chris the Potato and Mushroom Puree, whilst Brother Gerry’s – Chicken Nambali – Breast of chicken pieces, marinated, grilled & finally garnished with melting cheese. Served with fried onions, tomatoes & potatoes – was a totally new experience. Katie ordered Masala Fish, that would be interesting.

The Chops numbered Five, as opposed to the normal Four. However, the Shriveled Chops were visibly smaller than those served on previous visits. One bite per Chop before gnawing. The Chops were Very Spicy and cooked to Charcoal on the Periphery. More Charcoal than Meat was an exaggerated note. Still, they went quickly, very enjoyable.

Tracey was enjoying her Seekh Kebab, she was impressed by the Moistness. Hector was offered a sample, but knowing the volume of food that was imminent, No thank you.
Katie’s Masala Fish was decidedly – Dry. On an normal day this would be welcomed, but it did appear to be lacking.  Nowhere near as good as Yadgar’s – Scottish Haddock. The Potato and Mushroom Puree looked Sound. The Chicken Nambali looked – Yuch! It was exactly as described.
Mein Host, Shiraz, came to check that all was well. It was. The table was cleared and Modest Salad set at intervals. Nibbles. Ten minutes – Naveed advised until The Mains. Akbar’s was not that busy so this was a likely estimate.

The Mains

A Fish Curry sat on the table briefly whilst the Roshan Lal were distributed. This looked again – Dry, but not in the Indian Mango sense. Mother India’s Cafe still currently serves the best Fish Curry I know of in this City.
Howard could find no Green Peppers in his Roshan Lal, nor did anyone else. Was it blended in the Masala? If that was the case then no problem. It is the Texture and its use as Ballast that Hector objects to. This means I was relegated to the Lesser – Lamb Karahi for no reason.

With the Paratta still too hot to handle, Hector was set. There was the polite wait whilst the Rice and ridiculous Naans were placed between us. Tracey (left) has never looked so good in a photo.
The Wonderfully Flaky Paratha in hand, the Masala was dipped. Spice and Seasoning were to the fore. The Masala was Dark and more voluminous than would be served in Bradford. The Lamb was cut Bradford-small and there was plenty of it, no Bones. There was a lot of Lamb, it would take Hector and age to finish this Dish. Knowing that eating an entire Paratha and all this Lamb was impossible, I did the usual: enjoy the Paratha whilst it was Fresh then concentrate on finishing the Karahi. Still the Spice and Seasoning were dominant. The distinctive Bradford Herb Flavours were not there. The Karahi was so Spicy it was difficult for any real Flavour to emerge.  John had asked for his Roshan Lal to be – Phal – Hot.  Comments awaited.

Also sprach Howard:

In another medium he wrote – I was so looking forward to a curry here as I enjoy the ‘Bradford style’. In the end it was a big let down. All you could taste was spice and lots of salt. Yadgar and Karahi Palace are still 2 of the best in Glasgow. I don’t think I’ll be back here in the near future.
Tracey and Katie fared better, almost. Tracey was convinced the Paneer had been made on the premises – Not as rubbery as supermarket Paneer, which impresses. The best Paneer I have ever had.

Katie concurred with Tracey about the Paneer but also stated – The spice covered the flavour, very hot, can’t taste much else.

The Chicken and Spinach Balti didn’t look too shabby, for a Chicken Curry!

Katie departs shortly for life in Leeds. Leeds has Bradford on its doorstep. When Hector’s life meant part-time residence in Pudsey, one went West!

The Bill
£203.65. This must be the largest Bill ever posted on Curry-Heute. One thirteenth of this was quite acceptable. Indeed The Table must have thought so too, somehow we ended up with a £32.00 Tip.
I asked Naveed for a Bottle of Champagne – Our Tip is too Large!

The Aftermath
It was time to introduce myself to our Excellent Waiter. It was not his fault that The Chef had lost the plot. Naveed had stated that – Asian Style – meant – Spicy, however, an Experienced Chef should not present a Dish that has Spice mask the Flavour.
The Curry-Heute website was shown to Naveed, complete with photo of Hector with Shabir, the Owner. Shiraz was called over, he has been Mein Host for about a year having started as a Waiter presumably around the time Akbar’s opened in Glasgow. Hopefully, next time Hector will be recognised and receive the customary Roshan Lal – without, or maybe it’s time to try Something Completely Different?