It has taken months of trying, as it always does, for Alan and Hector to find a Saturday night when the two couples would be free to dine, together. Akbar’s (573-581 Sauchiehall Street G3 7PQ) was once again the chosen venue. Hint: Hector and Marg are overdue a night in Helensburgh.
The booking was for 19.00, we arrived a few minutes after, Akbar’s was stowed. I haven’t seen a restaurant this packed in years. Imran, Mein Host, greeted and asked us to wait at the bar until our/a table became free. I asked the rhetorical question:
How’s business?
Very good, you write, they come.
Hopefully, Curry-Heute does have some influence on people’s choice of venue. Bradford Curry in Glasgow, for those who can handle it, and the prices remain competitive.
Being a Saturday night, Hector was not having Sparkling Water: a pint of Cobra (£5.95) and a bottle of same (£3.75) for Tracy. Marg, the driver, had Cola (£3.75), eventually Alan managed to find a suitable bottle of wine (£21.45). (If there was a fifth pint, the price of the Cobra was less.)
I have known Alan for forty years, Cider is/was his thing, wine is taking some getting used to. He did admit to enjoying Früh Kölsch, at source, on a recent trip to Köln. There’s hope, but not a lot. More Bier would be ordered as the evening progressed, did I mention it was a Saturday night? This is where Akbar’s make their big profits.
Andy, from Romania, was our waiter this evening. He managed to serve us well without being too exuberant, as sometimes the staff here can be.
Poppadoms (£1.15) were declined, thank goodness. Of course had they arrived, as sometimes happens, they would have been appreciated by the ladies at least. Meat Chops (£6.70), as ever, would be the Starter, to share. Alan and Tracy’s version of sharing is two each. To ensure that Marg would not be put off her main course, Hector, the considerate, would split the Lamb Chops in a very fair: 3-1.
Alan asked for them to be – well done. The four of us like our Chops cremated.
No blood – I said to Andy. One wonders how flexible the pad is on which the Order was recorded.
Marg again came up with Karahi Fish (£13.40), to be accompanied by her customary Chapatti (£0.95), a repeat of the last Couples Night here. I trust it is the Bradford influence which keeps the Chapattis below a quid?
Alan and Tracy were both having Karahi: Karahi Gosht & Spinach (£13.40), Karahi Chicken & Spinach (£13.40) respectively, accompanied by a Chapatti each.
On my last visit to Akbar’s I spotted, too late, the poster for Charsi Karahi (£13.90). Tonight, I was on the verge of ordering my usual Roshan Laal (£12.40) when I saw the new addition to the menu. Andy was quick to tell me that this is the best Curry on offer. The description of taking – your taste buds back to Pakistan – did puzzle. Hopefully this Tomato-based Karahi would reveal its Afghan origins, however, was I about to give up on the distinctive – Bradford Curry Taste – which is why we come to Akbar’s?
A Coriander & Chilli Nan (£3.95) completed the Order, well almost. All but Marg’s Curry were asked for – Desi – style. It is important that one does this.
Note, the lack of differentiation in price for Lamb or Chicken at Akbar’s, another source of significant profit. That Fish is not sold at a premium, is unusual in the UK. Meat or Fish Curry at Akbar’s, therefore way better value than Chicken! And surely better Curry.
The presentation of Raita and the Mashed Pepper Dip preceded the arrival of the Starters. Despite the ingredients of this Dip, I have no issues with it. The Recipe is here – Pakora Sauce 2.
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Meat Chops
The portion remains four, possibly the best value in the city. The Salad went in Marg’s direction, who needs this when Chops have to be addressed?
Whilst there was no – pink – the Chops were still not fully cremated. The Spice Level probably took us all aback. Yay! More Seasoning – was my next note, why have all this marinade without Salt? Was the Hector put off? Of course not, three Lamb Chops, devoured, it’s been a while. Alan:
Chops very tasty, well fired, but not enough.
Succulent as they may have been, more burnt bits please.
On previous visits, the waiter has given timed updates as to when the Mains would arrive. Not an issue tonight, bring it on.
The Mains were brought by an army, assuming these were lesser Chefs, does this not get in the way of producing other orders? Still, it makes the meal an event, I like it.
I have nothing to say about the Chapattis, once they were eaten, all eyes became focussed on the Naan.
Don’t even think about having any of my Naan, may have drifted through the mind.
Help yourself – Hector the generous.
The Naan ticked all the boxes, puffiness, burnt blisters. The Chilli and Coriander were abundant, but not invasive. Alan spotted the major issue, why was it hung – upside down? The panhandle, such as it was, has to be on the end to start eating from, i.e. the bottom. Next time – can I have a Naan served pointy bit down?
Karahi Fish
Served with flaked Fish a la The Kashmir Restaurant (Bradford), this would have made a decent lunchtime Curry, for Hector. The quantity looked appreciably more than the standard Bradford portion. Akbar’s is not open at lunchtimes, they’re missing a trick here. The minimal Masala did not have the Kashmir – Tomatoiness.
Very small pieces of fish – reported Marg – with a thick masala. A good kick and flavoursome. It wasn’t very fishy (to taste).
There was no Soupçon for Hector, who was far too busy. But, come on, another Fish Karahi without a pronounced taste of Fish? Bring back Krakow!
Karahi Gosht & Spinach
It must be the – Karahi – which prevents this as being served as a mass of green. This is how Hector likes his Curry with Spinach. Slightly spicier than normal – began Alan – I always order this, very enjoyable and finished all, probably because – shared the chops.
Sharing Chops, the jury is still out.
Karahi Chicken & Spinach
The lesser Curry:
The food at Akbar’s was up to its usual standard.
Tracy added further comments, best kept for a few lines yet.
Charsi Karahi – Meat
When one presents Hector with a flat pan of voluminous Karahi, there is instant happiness. A slice of Lemon and a Sprinkling of Coriander topped the Karahi. Green Chillies, sliced length wise were seemingly abundant. With Chillies from the Naan also, maybes not.
Stupidly, I counted the Meat, twenty plus, but cut Bradford small. This was a feast. I was caught in two minds, wait for the big Tomato-Charsi blast and give up any distinctive Bradford Curry Taste, or hope for both.
There was a serious kick, but the Naan must have come into play here. Seasoning felt on the low side to begin with, but slowly emerged, this was fine. The Bradford Curry Taste – was there, this was comforting, why we come to Akbar’s.
Tender Meat, Minimal Masala, more boxes ticked, if one can taste a smell, the overall experience was akin to visiting a Souk.
However, I have to ask in what way was this – Charsi? There was no evidence of a Tomato-based Masala, how did this differ from a Punjabi Karahi? Maybe I missed it, I could be wrong. Tell me more. Next time, Roshan Laal, without.
There was a scene reminiscent of Oliver Twist at the end, except, we did not want more. Didn’t we do well?
As we were out – to dine – there would be Coffee. Cappuccino (£2.95) for Marg, Espresso (£2.95) pour les autres. For Hector, the choice was coffee, or a night’s sleep, I chose the latter.
A splendid meal, but time to give part #2 of our fellow diner’s comments:
The staff were super efficient and friendly. Especially Andy our waiter. Downside, the toilets let it down a wee bity. Alan reckons that the gents loo hasn’t been fixed for yonkies. Guess there (sic) just mega busy.
I shall add my bit, no means of drying one’s hands, except bog paper. Surely they are aware the hand driers do not work?
The Bill
£134.90 Outrageous! Only half of this was for food. Tap Water next time!
The Aftermath
Hot hand wipes, the wind down. Imran had also checked on our progress and described the Charsi as their best Curry.
Namak Mandi were due to move around the corner, Hector must check this out. They serve authentic Charsi Karahi.
At the end of August, Hector’s attempt at 
The tried and tested 
Adding the water always feels – wrong. This creates the very Shorva that Hector tries not to make. However, when I saw the end results, I realised that this could be the basis of a Chettinad. One day I’ll repeat this stage then try adding Curry Leaves, Dried Red Chillies and Smoked Paprika. Not since Lockdown #1 have I tried cooking Smokey Curry. 
Hector has a new local Takeaway – Spice India. So close to Hector’s House, it must appear in these pages soon. Annoyingly, it doesn’t stay open late enough for midnight Donner Kebap. But, close enough to send Marg along for some Bread whilst I prepared the 
Removing the Tomato skins is tricky, laborious, but the results are imminent, a Masala forms before one’s eyes. Last time I had less Meat, the result, 
The Masala was suitably brown and thick, despite the Tomato base, this was most certainly not a Red Curry! The quantity of Oil had been reined in, no residue at all.
The blast of Citrus took me by surprise. The Lemon Juice in the 
Back from 
A portion? Spicy? – asked Shery.
Those which I had seen in the tray behind the counter, were uncooked. Having watched the operation, I can verify that Marg’s Samosas were freshly baked, not a reheat which is the custom in the majority of venues. 
Hotter than hot – is how the Karahi is served at 
Schrödinger’s Chapatti
Karahi Lamb a la Hector at 
Prenzlauer Berg
I made an online booking for 15.00, this is recommended regardless of time of day. Marg and Hector were punctual. Indoors,
Lamb Curry – was the moniker used by the waitress as she presented Hector’s South Indian delight. Two dried Red Chillies floated in the Shorva-esque Masala. This is Hector’s sign of efficacy. I counted six large pieces of Meat and two pieces of Potato, Diversity. Each piece of Lamb would be halved and then some. I had judged the quantity of Rice on my plate to match the Curry portion. As ever when having Curry and Rice, I retained some of the Masala in the bowl for later, and for dipping the wonderful Parotta.
The Flavours were intense, the Spices hit the palate with ferocity. The great South Indian Smokiness, Clove too, glorious, and of course, the Seasoning was right there. The Meat had been infused, it was definitely in the – giving – category, loads of Flavour here, and well Tender Lamb. 
On seeing the remaining Masala, the bowl was taken back to the kitchen. 
I was keen to compare this with the above, after all, the Telanga is basically what I have encountered as Chettinad at other venues. Curry Leaves were aplenty in the Shorva. Mustard/Onion Seeds were in the Masala also. I remembered to take a second photo of Marg’s Curry today as she was having Rice. 
I commented upon how little Rice Marg had taken. Usually, a Chapatti is her accompaniment, but not when Curry is this – Soupy, and the Rice is inclusive. Marg too had consciously taken a quantity of Rice to match the volume of Masala. There is an optimum ratio of Rice to Masala, else one can end up with a swamp on the plate. Alternatively, and as was the case this afternoon, there wasn’t enough Masala to moisten the given Rice. Who wants to be left Plain Basmati? 
I asked Marg if she was getting – smokiness – from her Curry. Earthy – was as far as she would go. 
I’ll be having the same again, but hopefully with everything hotter than everything else. 
By 16.00 the place had all but emptied. Reader take note. This gave the opperchancity to secure more photos. 
The Indian Island (Swietej Jadwigi 10/1a, 50-266 Wroclaw, Polska) was recommended to us by Manoj at 
Despite a lack of contact, we returned one hour later. The restaurant was still full, all tables occupied, or were they? A small, round table at the door, possibly used for Takeaway business, had no chairs. I made it clear that we were not for hanging about. Marg pointed to the small table. Chairs were provided, two of the available twenty six were unoccupied. The Hector was sitting almost as much in the restaurant as out. The menu was brought within seconds.
Mutton Tawa (Zl45) was something different on a Polish menu, a Karahi variant. Marg, after he enjoyment of 
Basmati Rice (Zl6) was clearly listed on the menu, however, today we were taking no chances. It was confirmed that Rice was included with mains. Cue the opperchancity to go that bit further. I had seen the Naan by the time of ordering. A Butter Naan (Zl13) was added. A competitively priced 660ml bottle of Sparkling Water (Zl12) and a Masala Tea (Zl12) completed the Order. 
A family, who initially relative to us, sat in the far corner, were now adjacent. I couldn’t believe it when even more food arrived at their table. I had witnessed the chap in particular, gorging earlier. It was no surprise when a fair quantity of Curry, Rice and Bread was packed for Takeaway. Why do people over-order and under-eat to this extent? 
The Butter Naan may well be added to the category of – best ever! Large, just how large is lost having been cut into four. The long panhandle and the multiple blisters confirmed the efficacy, this was a Tandoori Naan. The Butter had helped make it both soft and flaky. The whiteness, butteriness and the softness brought – Malabar Parotta – to mind. I checked for layering, not really. This Naan was the best of both worlds. 
Topped with rings of uncooked Onion fresh Coriander, here was a typical Mainstream, blended Masala. Expectations were adjusted accordingly. 
Yesterday’s horror story
The Masala in this Tawa had plenty of Flavour, a potency perhaps. This was a Flavour I very much recognised but cannot describe other than the oft used – Euro Curry Taste. It cannot be down to a Spice I do not know, unless it’s what Nutmeg does to Curry. Burnt Coconut? But then it would taste – South Indian. My conclusion is that it must be something missing, or not liberally added. Cloves, Cumin Seeds, Cinnamon, Cardamom, come to mind, and dare I mention – Fenugreek? 
We had both overdosed on Naan. Have I convinced the reader that this was an outstanding Naan? 
When our fellow diners were served, I saw two platters of Basmati being brought to the table. 
Accompanied by a Raita which was not touched, this was a veritable feast of Rice and Vegetables. Large pieces of Paneer stood out, Cauliflower, Peas, Carrots and Green Beans were in the melange. Here was the Diversity of Textures that Hector seeks. With a complexity of Flavours in its own right, this was an excellent Biryani. I think I might be getting Marg on board with Rice:
Madras Jagniecina
The apparently ubiquitous sprinkling of Coconut topped the Masala with Ginger Strips and Coriander also. I counted only six pieces of Meat as I arranged the Lamb on the Biryani, however, each would require halving or more. Enough Meat. The Masala was viscous, however, 
Wtf? A blast of blandness hit the Hector palate. This Curry was woefully under-seasoned. It was as if all Salt had been extracted. The Spice Level was – medium – at best. Whilst the Meat was super-soft, it gave absolutely nothing back. 
Welcome to the world of Chicken Soup. This was far from any – Methi – served in a Punjabi Curry House. The wonderful Herb had simply been stirred into the Creamy Shorva. I dipped my fork in the Masala. Creamy, yes, but at least here was a depth of Flavour, sharper on the tongue, not a Curry I would want, but it had its merits. 
The Butter Roti never did arrive. The waiter admitted he had not placed the order for the Roti. 
Marg and Hector arrived at 
I took the same seat as on 
Having enjoyed the 
A threat of Fresh Coriander sat atop a viscous Masala. I counted six large pieces of Meat as I decanted, plus a few tiddlers. With the Mushrooms, there would be plenty of solids. Curry Leaves and Onion/Mustard Seeds were mixed through the Masala. It is only in recent times that I have come to recognise that the Curry Leaves can act as a source of the Smoky Flavour associated with South Indian Cuisine. There was an underlying Creaminess to the Masala, a feature of seemingly all Curry in 
The Spice Level and Seasoning were well pitched, consequently there was a burst of Flavour onto the palate. The Smokiness was there, the Creaminess not intrusive. The Mutton was delightfully Tender, the menu claims it had been marinated, and so had time to absorb the Flavours. Suddenly there was a blast of Coriander, from the Rice, yay.
The description said a – coconut base – there was quite a sprinkling of Coconut on top of the Red Masala. Steve made some very positive comments as he ate, having had a thousand or so Lamb Madras, he knows this Curry well:
Salmon! It does help when the menu informs the diner what type of Fish is being served. Salmon is also remarkably filling, as everyone who has ever tackled a Salmon Curry will testify. 
Manoj was delighted to receive the praise that followed the meal. He told us that they have been lucky in holding on to their Chef in the two years since Delhi opened.
Manoj was intrigued by the fact that we try to get to 
Marg enquired about a large bottle of Sparkling Water, this appeared to be accepted, however, it was a jug of Tap Water which was presented.
The Masala was thin, Soupy, Shorva-esque. I was about to decant the Meat when I noticed it was far too pale to be Lamb. Chicken Curry, nobody asked for Chicken. 
There was a kick to the thin sauce, and I enjoyed dipping my Roti to maximise the flavour. Chicken is not my favoured meat in a Curry, because it doesn’t hold the flavour. 
No bucket. The thicker Masala was certainly more appealing. A Creamy Masala may be Marg’s Heaven, this was not quite Hector Hell. With a Cashew Nut garnish, the mind was already prepared for what followed. 
There was a decent Spice Level which grew marginally as I ate. After yesterday’s assault at 
We ate the lot, the waiter could only smile when he saw the empty plates. 
Zayka (Jozefa Dietla 50/1, 31-039 Kraków, Polska) has moved north of the Vistula to a more down-town location on the boundary between Stare Miasto and Kazimierz. Having been impressed by the Fayre served up at 
Marg placed her order for Masala Chai (Zl9) whilst I perused the menu. Eventually I decided upon Bhuna Gosht (Zl45) which I hadn’t had previously, accompanied by Veg Pulao (Zl16). 
A bottle of Sparkling Water (Zl9) completed the Order. 
The advertised 500ml bottle turned out to be 300ml, charged at the same price, of course. Marg’s milky tea was consumed long before the arrival of the food. 
Six, yes – six – pieces of Lamb sat in a proportionate quantity of blended Masala. I’ve had so called – Tapas – portions comparable to this at home. 
Above Medium Spice – had been agreed at the time of ordering. For Chef, this meant – Spicy. Some would not have coped with the Spice Level in this Curry. There was a distinctive Earthy Flavour at the start, with Cumin coming across clearly. Thereafter, the palate was basically wrecked, this was just abut the heat, and a lack of Seasoning. Seasoning may have rescued this Curry which quite simply became an ordeal. 
The Meat, which had to be eked out, was Tender-Chewy. This gave some respite from the intensity of the Masala. For once, that the Lamb was not adding much in the way of Flavour to the Curry, was quite an advantage. 
Karahi Palace
The Chapattis seemed incidental, they did their job. Once again, the Mushroom Rice was totally satisfying, and this week, there would be no waste or Takeaway. Fresh Mushrooms in a well-flavoured Pilau, it sort of belongs with a Curry. 
Today, I was convinced I could see Tomato Seeds in the Blended Masala. Black Cardamom and Cinnamon Bark were revealed as I decanted the solids. Dr. Stan had a Sucky Bone today, the Hector not. The bone count was minimal meaning a lot of eating. 
Spicy by name, Spicy on the palate. Let’s say the level of Seasoning was – understood. Why is that the Meat in Curry Cafes tends to give so much more Flavour than Restaurants? There was a comforting amalgamation of Spices, complemented by a hint of Creaminess and Citrus. 
Dr. Stan was quick to appreciate that this Curry was markedly different in Flavour than our customary Karahi:
Usually a Shorva as tradition requires, the Masala today was indistinguishable from the Spicy Korma, well in terms of appearance. Mags drew my attention to a Sucky Bone and whole Peppercorns. 
Rammed full of flavour – was an early comment. Why the Masala was thicker today, I didn’t ask, not my Curry. Clearly, this was a departure from the norm at 
with the Spicy Lamb Korma a close second. Can one have three Signature Dishes? 
When possible, I take photos of the prepared Curry as posted above. What on earth was this slimy creation, full of the