Whitechapel – Lahore Kebab House – Once upon a time

Four of us dining at Lahore Kebab House (2-10 Umberston St., Whitechapel, London, E1 1PY, England), a first. Jonathan and Lady Maggie joined Lord Clive and Hector on the trek to Whitechapel, not made easy by disrupted Underground services. Bus 15, never again.

We arrived at 13.30, the waiter acknowledged us in a manner suggesting recognition, Clive and I were here a few weeks ago. Then the Fish Curry (£9.75) was not available, hopefully today.

There had to be Seekh Kebab (£1.50). In northern parts, one might expect two for this price, in that London, this is the unit price. We were all having Seekh Kebab, Clive and Jonathan declared two each. To this, Maggie added a Chicken Samosa (£1.75), when will she learn? I did announce to all assembled that there is a well known and reliable Curry Blog which describes every time Maggie has failed to finish her Main Course due to overindulging in Starters. She suggested that the Samosas might become Takeaway.

Lahore Kebab House was decidedly more quiet than it was on our last (Sunday) visit. Our waiter was patient and actually suggested that the Masala Fish (£9.00) Starter, served in foil, might be a better option. Hector was having Fish Curry with Plain Rice (£4.25) to accompany. Maggie would have the same. Is this the most expensive Rice in a Curry Cafe in the UK?

As Maggie was about to recite the list of options to Clive, I suggested we cut to the chase – there must be a Dhansak. Actually, it’s not on the Menu, however, our waiter offered this without a blink of the eye. Lamb Dhansak (£9.75) was noted, along with a Keema Naan (£4.00). It came as no surprise when Jonathan ordered Keema Curry (£9.75) and a Tandoori Roti (£2.50). How can a Roti cost more than a Naan?

A Salad and Raita were presented. If there had only been two of use would we have received the same quantity? I believe so. Anyway, we were not here for Salad.

The Seekh Kebab were brought on a single platter, guess who now wished he had ordered two?

Seekh Kebab

That these have become – must have – is down to them being so well cooked. Moist and tasty, with a Spicy Blast, excellent.

Chicken Samosa

Evidently, I saw this fine pastry, whatever happened to it, I know not.

No sooner had we finished our Starters when the Mains began arriving, all the more reason to limit the quantity of Starters.

The Rice was piled high on the plate, Maggie thought this was to share until a second plate arrived. Lesson learned, a portion each is probably not required. The Roti was large, puffy even, one would certainly do the job.

The Keema Naan looked like a meal in itself. Large, very well stuffed, almost a winner but not in the World of Curry-Heute. The filling was a slab of Pink Meat, the sadly familiar – Donner-like – which Hector eschews. Clive was not put off, he devoured it in his customary way, after he had finished his Curry.

Fish Curry

When Clive ordered this back in May 2019, I described the Fish Curry as – The Best Fish Curry I have ever seen. I do differentiate between Curry and Karahi, expectations are different. Today’s offering was clearly not in the same class, too much Shorva, the hint of – Yoghurt – not there. It gets worse.

As seen on my visits to date, no other Curry has copious strips of Onions, so why this one? Additionally, there were two pieces of the offending – green mush – present. By the time I had decanted, I was not left with the Curry I had hoped for. At least I had Rice, Bread would have been a disaster.

The Spice Level was decent, the Seasoning seemed low which always puzzles in a Fish Curry. Of course it could have been a freshwater Fish. A big blast of Aniseed took me by surprise. Fortunately, as I ate so the Spice, Seasoning, and Fish Flavour steadily built, first impressions were wrong, taste wise. This was a good Fish Curry, but not that – something special – I had hoped for.

Maggie praised the Rice for not being sticky between wipes of her nose. She was having a different experience:

Fish had lots of sauce, bit of a kick, made my nose run. Lots of Fish, I’m sure there was coriander, cinnamon, in there, couldn’t taste them, too hot … gheeie.

Maggie’s leftover Shorva came my way, to mop up the remaining Rice. Yes, share a Rice portion.

Keema Curry

This was nothing like the Keema Curry which Clive enjoyed here six weeks ago. As with the Fish Curry, there was way to much Masala, an Oily Shorva at that. OK, if one is being consistent, then a Curry will be wetter than a Karahi, in the better establishments. However, a wet Keema always gets marked down.

A bit more sauce and oil than I would have expected – began Jonathan – with a rich flavour and a good, hot after-taste.

Lamb Dhansak

What an incredible amount of Meat! Once again, the Masala was in the same style as the Curry above, where were the Lentils? A Dhansak must surely have a thicker Masala? As Clive started eating so he suggested that the Lamb tasted as if the preparation had started days ago. Twenty plus – was his Meat count, surely a record for a standard portion? It sounded as though he had the most impressive Curry served to our table.

Overall, excellent – remarked Clive – but not many lentils were harmed in the making of this Dhansak. Lots of Lamb, Keema Naan was excellent, full of Keema.

The Bill

£63.25   We were asked for cash, the restaurant was running short. Between us, we managed it, just.

Only £1.00 was charged for the Tandoori Roti which Jonathan remarked he had seen three prices for on the various menus. The Dhansak was also listed as a Karahi. What did Clive receive?

The Aftermath

Our departure was low key. Another long bus journey took us to Hackney Wick. En route, I decided to give Curryspondent Neil’s other Whitechapel suggestion when I return to the city on Thursday. Watch out for a review of – Needoo Grill.

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